Texas: Dreaming beats actions of nutty governor

Gov. Good Hair is back in the news. Or should I say Republican Texas Gov. Rick “Good Hair” Perry has made the news once more with one of his stupid utterances.

This time the former and perhaps future 2016 candidate for the GOP presidential nomination has a conspiracy theory blaming President Obama for the massive influx of Central American children who have been creating a refugee crisis at the U.S. border. Perry repeated the ridiculous theory he made last week on Fox News to ABC News’ Martha Raddatz on “This Week” Sunday.

 “I have to believe that when you do not respond in any way, that you are either inept, or you have some ulterior motive of which you are functioning from,” Perry said.

Of course Perry didn’t elaborate on his theory. I suppose some cockamamie illegal entry conspiracy hatched by the president is about as possible as North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un getting signed along with his pal Dennis Rodman to a NBA contract. Because that would be the likelihood of such a theory as fact.

It is also no big surprise Good Hair wants permission from the Federal Aviation Administration to put drones on the border. I’m sure Perry also wants those drone armed with Hellfire missiles, or at the very least Vulcan 20-mm cannons. That way he can now operate a fully functioning Texas Department of Public Safety Air Force as well as Navy. Hell, DPS probably has more armament than some Third World nations.

All of this Perry bluster is something he is aiming — sorry for the pun — toward his ultra Tea Party klan. I suppose he failed to look at some of the recent primary election races in which the Teas were beat like rented mules.

I don’t really expect Democratic state Sen. Wendy Davis to win the race for Texas governor although stranger things have happened. Under the “stranger things” department perhaps GOP hopeful Attorney General Greg Abbott may tone down his rhetoric and actions should he win that race for guv. We need a highway patrol again and not a Texas Armed Forces. Not to mention the state will go broke if Abbott files anymore of his ridiculous lawsuits. But then, I’m just dreaming. Dream on little dreamer dream on …

And when all else fails, talk turns to Texas

Seems Texas is in the political news today. Nothing new. It shouldn’t be. I mean why should it, given this is the second largest state in population and the second largest in area? It’s two (smack) two (smack) two number two states in one.

Sr. Comadreja, a.k.a Sen. Ted Cruz, the Canadian-Cuban who represents the two-for-two state in the upper house was visiting here in Beaumont yesterday at the Spindletop-Gladys City Boomtown Museum. The symbolism is not lost because the museum is only a short-short away from the gusher that started the modern petroleum industry. So, Cruz represents the “new” Tea Party face of the Republican party, but doesn’t want to shy away from that good ol’ awl money. Dana Bash of CNN was interviewing Cruz at the Boomtown, asking him about all kinds of insignificant matters. Such as Ted Nugent campaigning for Greg Abbott, Texas attorney general and candidate for the Republican nomination for governor.

Nugent said some things which are really not very meaningful when it comes to anything. Unless, perhaps you interpret ol patriotic, draft-dodging Teddy’s words as racist. But the media, mostly the cable news networks, have to pounce on these things. He called President Obama a “subhuman mongrel” and some other things which weren’t nice. When Abbott was questioned about the aging rock singer’s remarks, the GOP goober-natorial candidate for governor ran away from the media with both hands over his ears, screaming: “Nonononononon!!” All of that is pretty difficult since Abbott’s weird encounter, some years back, when a tree fell on him as he was jogging. I mean that is what insurance companies mean when they say: ” … act of God … ” That didn’t stop lawyer Abbott for suing the pants and just about everything else off the people “responsible.” Yes indeed, what a good Republican-stop-lawsuit-abuse fellow. As a matter of fact, Abbott continued to sue folks upon taking oath as Texas AG, especially suing the U.S. of A.

Perhaps for good measure, or Good Hair, Wolf Blitzer had old Good Hair himself on his program this afternoon. Gov. Rick Perry was hemmin’ and hawin’ about, whom else? Ted Nugent.

 “He shouldn’t have said that about the president, said Perry. “But we should be focused on what’s really important here.”

Whatever that might be.

 “Ted has said some pretty outrageous things … ” I do have a problem with somebody calling the president a mongrel.”

“That was a ‘subhuman mongrel!’ ” Wolf reiterated.

Yeah, well. A few free minutes of watching the “news” after an exhausting day all shot to hell by the “subhuman” elite of Texas politics.

The Trans-Louisiana express: Unearthing friendliness in the Pelican State

Wednesday saw me take what might be called a “whirlwind trip” to Louisiana. I had to do safety inspections in Lafayette and Alexandria, then drive back home to Beaumont in the same day. It has been awhile since I covered that much ground. My best guess is that I drove about 300 miles. I’ve not had time to study the odometer readings I had to write down for my work vehicle.

The sun was rising above all the huge petrochemical pipe towers when I neared Lake Charles. A perfectly clear morning. It was even more a spectacular sight when summiting the Interstate 10 bridge over the Calcasieu River.

It was on that same trek to Lafayette that I found myself being serenaded by the fiddles and accordion as well as the soulful sounds of Cajun French lyrics. Although I live in what is called “Cajun Texas” this area I found myself in is the real Boudreaux. The station, KBON 101.1 FM in Eunice, La., is a channel I have listened to many times on the internet and somehow just forgot about it.

The two-step Cajun music, as well as a little Clifton Chenier zydeco thrown in, recalled my younger days when I would drive from my Navy base in Gulfport, Miss., maybe once a month or every couple of months to my Texas hometown near Louisiana border. Rather than from this side of Lafayette, I would pick up a station after traveling through Baton Rouge and the long bridges on I-10 of the Atchafalya Basin. I don’t know if it was the same station or call letters. Back then I only had an AM radio in my car. Not only would I heard the music of Acadien but some of the lesser-known songs of “hippy” music, the kind of B-sides or album cuts you hear when someone puts the record on, but aren’t the more popular tunes. Either way: “Looka!” I done found myself in the land of Ca-juns!

I made my first trip to downtown Alexandria. It was pretty underwhelming from the area in which I saw it. It’s not as bleak as our county neighbor Port Ar-ture (Port Arthur, Texas), but at least from the view presented from I-49 Alexandria definitely lacked curb appeal.

The trip home was a bit confusing to say the least. I intended to take U.S. Hwy. 165, which would bring me back to I-10 in Iowa (La.) and not a long trip from Iowa back to Lake Charles and the Texas line. But I didn’t see any signs, for some reason, for Hwy. 165. I did see ones for U.S. 167, so that was the road I took. I eventually came to this nice-sized eatery and grocery store that had the look of the famous Buc-ee’s with the cleanest restrooms in Texas. Or so they say. I figured, why not stop, especially since the name of the place is “Y-Not Stop.”

This place was more like Buc-ees than I had imagined. It even had clean restrooms and a couple of terminals in the restaurant from which you could place your order, extract a ticket and sit down. They would call your name and you could pay or you could pay and they would still call your name. That’s not to say it was a knock-off of Buc-ee’s. It just had some similarities.

While waiting I looked at the map function on both smart phones I had with me — a Blackberry from work and an iPhone that is my personal cell — for a road to take me home. My preference was finding Hwy. 165. Both phones proved useless, mainly because the hair-trigger screens are a nightmare for a person with tremors in his hand.

I finally resorted to the old-fashioned way of navigation. I asked for directions.

First I asked a guy sitting across from me. He wasn’t from the area but he did his best. By then I had received a catfish sandwich with a fried filet halved and placed on a wheat bun with the dressings I ordered. I knew I shouldn’t but I also ordered their onion rings. Oh my, they were lightly crusted with a light-brown look and it felt like eating, well, a ring of onion, only one with a light crust of corn meal, flour and whatever secret seasoning that was concocted for this delight.

Before finishing, this big ol,’ good ol’ boy came walking undoubtedly on his way out.

“You need directions to Highway 167? I grew up around here.”

I told him I did. He told me to go down “this road take a right, go over the bridge, you’ll cross under I-49 and you’ll come to  167 in Woodworth.”

Woodworth rang a bell. I had asked directions of the people I met in both Alex and Lafayette. They told me about Woodworth and told me to watch my speed because the place was a speed trap.

“And,” said the good ol’ boy, “Watch your speed when you come to Woodworth.”

I was doubtful about the directions because it put me on a narrow, paved road. The road crossed a wood bridge and it snaked around what looked like a river or bayou that mirrors the larger Red River nearby. This was a reddish-clay type water body and that same redness coated leaves lying about the previously flooded areas. It reminded me of the area around Nacogdoches, TX, where I spent many younger and semi-younger days. Eventually, I crossed under I-49 and came to the town of Woodworth. I saw the speed limit of 35 mph, so I set my cruise control to 30. I finally got out on Hwy. 165, still going 30 for quiet a ways. Good thing, because I saw a couple of police cars had someone pulled over. After awhile I came through the casino town of Kinder, home to the Coushatta Indian casino, then knew I had only an hour or so before getting home.

It was quite an interesting day, despite having a continued bout with a bum knee. I have no idea what’s wrong with it. I am waiting to hear from a specialist about an appointment. I thought about how Texas had the motto: “Friendship.” It was apparently from the days the Caddo roamed the then-virgin pine forests of East Texas. I always liked to think Texas had the friendliest people in the country. It might not seem so these days with our opportunistic Gov. Good Hair, folks like the jackass freshman Republican U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz and the assortment of nuts that make up the Tea Party arm of the GOP in the Texas and U.S. legislatures.

But I had to say, for today at least, our neighbors to the east can be pretty worthy of that “friendship” motto. Thanks to my Louisiana friends.

 

 

 

 

‘Pow!’ Time to duck and cover kids. Teachers be packin’ heat!

The end of this month brings to an end the current session of the Texas Legislature. That would be good news in itself were it not for the fact that with the end of the lawmaking comes the culmination of a horse race for “Most Ridiculously Insane Texas Law of 2013.”

At the present we have a very solid leader for that race as lawmakers run out the clock with the inane, the idiotic and the imbecilic a.k.a. Texas Law. The front-runner makes a statement about guns, that being: The only way to combat gun violence on Texas school campuses is to turn the first grade into the OK Corral.

A bill innocently known as HB 1009 establishes secret “school marshals” which according to the bill’s text also creates:  ” … the training and appointment of certain employees of a school district or open-enrollment charter school as school marshals, and the rights, restrictions, limitations, and responsibilities of school marshals; authorizing the imposition of a fee.”Hmm, seems like there’s always a fee. No taxes though.The Senate passed the measure with a rousing 28-3 margin. Sing it — “People all over the world, join hands, join the gun train, gun train … ” The bill is headed for an inking by our gooder-n-good-haired Guv, Mister Perry his own damned self.

Rep. Jason Villalba, R-Dallas, authored the gun bill. Villalba told The Texas Tribune that the program is modeled after the federal air marshal program and the identity of the participants will supposedly be held closely. Only certain school officials, DPS, and local LEOs shall know. Yep, something looks different about Coach these days. Can’t tell what it is with those tiny shorts and a bulge from his backside. Must be some kind of new jockstrap.

“This legislation provides school districts with a cost-effective school security option that includes robust training tailored to protect children in schools during an active shooter situation,” Villalba said.

And details? What about those details? The district may appoint only one marshal per 400 students. That district “may, but shall not be required to” pay for the employee’s training. And check this out! A school marshal may carry a concealed handgun on campus but only if district regulations provide the employee is not in direct contact with students as part of the employee’s normal routine. However, the marshal:

 ” … may possess a handgun on the physical premises of a school in a locked and secured safe within the marshal’s immediate reach when conducting the marshal’s primary duty. The written regulations must also require that a handgun carried by or within access of a school marshal may be loaded only with frangible ammunition designed to disintegrate on impact for maximum safety and minimal danger to others.”

Frangible? Fragile – brittle – breakable – frail – tender – friable. I had to look it up.

I see all kinds of trouble ahead with this legislation. Yes, I’m talking trouble with a capital T, that rhymes with P and that stands for “Pow!” Trouble too extensive to extenuate! Too God-awful to genuflect! First Amendment problems. Fourth Amendment woes. Logistical problems.

“Coach, you can’t go out on the field anymore unless you move your gun safe out there! 444-44-4 or not!”

Such silliness. The Tea Partyers, the RINOs, the regular old Republicans, even the Dems, they don’t want to piss off the NRA. So the Lege just throws something together up into the atmosphere and see where it lands.

Maybe somewhere down the line that landing will bring weapons to the students so it will give them a fighting chance.

Texas AG: My name is “Sue.” How do you do?

Fate would seem to guarantee that had Gregory Wayne Abbott been born a girl his parents would have named him Sue. Or so one would think.

As of September 2012 the Texas Attorney General “Greg” Abbott had run through more than $2.5 million of the taxpayers money from having filed 24 lawsuits against the United States. It also appears that Abbott hasn’t run out of things over which to sue the federal government.

An article today in the right-wing Washington Times says Abbott is once again threatening to sue Uncle Sam. This time Abbott plans to waste more scarce tax dollars in litigation should President Obama sign a United Nations Arms Trade Treaty.

Earlier today the UN General Assembly approved the treaty over 23 abstentions and “no” votes coming from North Korea, Iran and Syria. What great company Abbott is in with his animus toward the treaty!

The UN News Center, the official news site for the organization explains what the treaty will and will not do:

 “The treaty regulates all conventional arms within the following categories: battle tanks, armoured combat vehicles, large-calibre artillery systems, combat aircraft, attack helicopters, warships, missiles and missile launchers, and small arms and light weapons.

 “According to the UN Office for Disarmament Affairs, the treaty will not do any of the following: interfere with domestic arms commerce or the right to bear arms in Member States; ban the export of any type of weapon; harm States’ legitimate right to self-defence; or undermine national arms regulation standards already in place.”

Those darned Europeans and their “misspelled: words such as “armoured,” “calibre,” and “defence!” Why it would make a pure-D, red-blooded American want to go buy a big batch of Freedom Fries.

It’s that Second Amendment right of U.S. citizens which has the AG’s boxers in a bunch. Well, I’m not sure he wears boxers and I suppose men’s undies really shouldn’t be a topic here since Abbott is partially paralyzed and wheelchair-bound. That’s not to say Abbott is a great leader in rights for the disabled. He’s not. And even though he is of the Republican religion whose tenets say “thall shall not sue,” Abbott started off his career as a de facto serial plaintiff’s lawyer by suing the owner of the tree that fell on the future Texas AG as he was jogging by.

Abbott said in a letter to the president that the treaty fails to recognize an individual’s right to bear arms and to protect their families. He claims the treaty will be carried out by bureaucrats who are not accountable to U.S. citizens.

“I recognize that the ostensible purpose of the treaty is to combat the illegal international trade of weapons into third-world war zones,” Abbott writes. And writes. “The treaty could, however, draw law-abiding gun owners and gun store operators into a complex web of bureaucratic red tape created by a new department at the UN devoted to overseeing the treaty. For instance, the treaty appears to lay the groundwork for an international gun registry overseen by the bureaucrats at the UN.”

His legal rant to Obama is an example of the “black helicopter” style of paranoia that Abbott taps into for furthering his political career. How can one forget his threat during the 2012 elections to order any international election observer arrested who would dare show up at a Texas polling place?

Was it not that the AG was playing to his Tea Party base the litigant-averse Republicans would burn Mr. Abbott, and presumably his wheelchair, in effigy for the filing of frivolous lawsuits. In fact, a law signed in 2011 by fellow mad dog Republican Gov. Rick Perry seeks payment for court costs in suits in which the loser must pay.  Would that happen with all the frivolous suits filed by Greg Abbott?

Well, it is like that old saying that old sayers say all the time, at least Democratic ones: If hypocrisy was a crime, most of our Texas elected officials would be behind the cross bars!

Will Perry run or just hunt coyotes?

If I had access to Lexis-Nexis I bet I could find a quote where our Good-haired Guv, Mr. Perry, supports term limits. I say that because he has been in elected office for some time now. Maybe he didn’t say it at a press availability which now seems to be favored by both politicians and media alike because it is easy. Maybe he said at some small town function where he, as a young House member, didn’t figure the Whipoorwill City news made it to Austin or Dallas.

But I don’t have Lexis. I don’t even have PublicData at the moment. It would be something rich to throw in Good Hair’s face when he runs for Governor or President or Travis County commissioner. The GOP wouldn’t care. Hypocrites are no problem. The Democrats would make hay with such lines, for sure.

And we should care why? It looks like the Guv might just run again.

Perry told the Dallas Regional Chamber that his biggest potential foe as governor, Attorney General Greg Abbott has pledged he will not run against him if he decides to run for an unprecedented fourth term. Of course, that’s if Abbott doesn’t decide to have the governor indicted for some crime or the other. Then he runs for governor. That also depends whether one of the big powers in Texas politics decides to run against him. There are certainly some big pols circling the Governor’s Mansions like buzzards these days. I speak of Lite Gov. David Dewhurst, and others who have been patiently waiting their turn to be picked as the “Good Party Man,” or lady if, for instance, Comptroller Susan Combs decides it’s her turn.

The chamber types were told by the Guv that he would decide sometime this summer. I can’t hardly wait.

California burnin,’ Texas style!

Well if this isn’t a fine how do you do. The state of California is known for its wild fires that get out of control when the Santa Ana winds start blowing and whatever other kinds of natural freaks show up. And now? I don’t know whether the state just doesn’t have enough left to burn or is worried about what is left. But, a California university wants to pay to burn a patch of Texas ground.

Now I know the fire and environmental folks around Houston, where the 115 acres was scheduled for torching during the gusty winds this afternoon, have seen plenty of their own land go up in smoke and flames. Hey, wake up! Remember the disaster last year in Bastrop? Almost 1,700 homes burned up in the county, less than 100 miles away from Houston.

I suppose some of the folks out on the left coast just have money to burn. Break out the Gatorade for the firefighters and some margaritas for the neighbors. This sounds like something Guvnuh Good Hair Perry dreamed up.

 

The good news is the world hasn’t ended. The bad news is the world hasn’t ended.

It’s not the end of the world, at least not yet, and President Obama has given me Monday off in addition to Tuesday. So that is, at least, some good news.

I wrote a little here on this blog until the battery on my MiFi went dead. Then I spent the next hour and a half talking to Verizon techs who will gladly send me a battery with a 90-day warranty for $10 or a new battery for $40. Well, I finally figured out I could get four batteries in a year for that one new battery. Of course, it will likely cause lost hours to get it, just as it did today.

Upon finally figuring out how to set up a wireless network with my iPhone, I am back on the old Internets. However, about half of my post  had vanished. I had written today about the irresponsibility of the GOP Congress in pushing us over the “fiscal cliff” and how the Texas lawmakers and Gov. Good Hair must be ecstatic about the NRA’s big announcement today. By golly, ol’ Wayne LaPierre LePew of the NRA wants more guns in the schools. I think back in the good ol’ days of the Cold War they called that MAD, that stands for Mutually Assured Destruction. Kill ‘em all, let God sort ‘em out. Oh Pierre LaPew also thinks we need to get rid of violent TV, movies and music.That’s the kind of macho folks we got running out state into the ground. As for LaPierre, that’s about the stupidest thing that I ever heard and certainly the most tactless flow of words I’ve heard from a lobbyist, what with those little kids getting buried every day this week up in Connecticut. Sir, have you no shame? I guess not.

Once again, I am not against guns. I just have a super dislike for stupidity. Meanwhile, the world is still as it is: Full of beauty and hope and a good number of stupid people in high places.

Top 10 bills to follow in the 2013 Texas Lege reduced by 7

Austin television station KXAN has an interesting Top 10 list of proposed bills to follow in the 2013 Texas legislative session. Some are downright playing-to-the-right-wing-base ignorant. Here are my top five from that list:

1. Drug testing for welfare — There will be no epidemic of poor folks using drugs by the time this bill, filed by GOP Sen. Jane Nelson of Flower Mound, passes than there is now. It’s a “feel-good” elixir for the right wing. It’s demagoguery plain and simple.

2. Ten Commandments in Class — Republican Rep. Dan Flynn of Van wants copies of the Ten Commandments placed in “prominent” places in the classroom. I’ve got nothing against the Ten Commandments, but they violate laws separating church and state. This will wind up in court(s) and cost the taxpayers untold dollars while losing the case.

3. TSA Anti-groping — It could only be a guess but I bet when the Twin Towers et. al. came down on 9/11 probably some of those hollering the loudest for the federal government to stop such a thing from happening were some of our friends on the right. And on the left. We have security now in airports and many think they are too important to be inconvenienced by precautions which often leads to them getting groped in the first place. Yes, it might be random. So what? You don’t have to fly. GOP Rep. David Simpson of Longview tried to pass this last session and Gov. Good Hair had it brought up in Special Session. Jeez, prohibit TSA groping? Can we also prohibit Fox News?

Well, I only got to three that were out-of-the-Solar-System-Stupid. That doesn’t mean the remainder are all winners, or losers for that matter.

–Open Carry — Republican Rep. George Lavender of Texarkana may file a bill similar to one he pushed last time which would allow those holding licenses to carry a concealed handgun to optionally carry the weapon in the open. I’ve often thought that this made more sense than allowing concealed carry only. At least if someone is openly carrying a gun one can see it and do all that is possible to either ignore that person or make sure that you have something twice that person’s firepower. No seriously, I don’t know but the proposal seems to have some good points as well as bad ones. I know a lot of folks who would like guns outlawed. I can see how that would be a good thing in a different world. We are unfortunately stuck with the world we have.

— Texting while driving. The GOP former House Speaker Tom Craddick of Midland is pushing this bill, which Good Hair vetoed, again. It needs to be not only passed, but signed by our idiot governor.

–Tuition freeze. Dan Branch, the Republican House member from Dallas wants college tuition in state institutions frozen for students for four years from the time they enter school. UT Austin currently freezes tuition for two years. This is to encourage finishing in four years. I think this is a good idea, perhaps with a fifth year available in emergency situations.

–SJR 6 — Casino and slot gambling. Sen. Rodney Ellis, D-Houston, and others want a constitutional amendment to let voters decide whether a small number of casinos should be allowed in Texas. Limited numbers of slot and video gambling machines at horse tracks would be allowed as would gambling at the state’s Indian reservations. I have no moral reservations about this, pardon the pun. I wonder if it can pass what with surrounding states and the large gambling interests behind those states.

–The rest — I have no opinion on the other bills listed. You can read them your own-self.

 

 

 

 

An open letter to the rest of America on the Texas secession issue

Dear Fellow Americans,

By now you may have heard of a petition addressed to the White House “We the People” Web site that seeks a peaceful withdrawal of Texas from the United States of America. The site allows petitions that upon reaching the threshold of 25,000 names may be reviewed and given an official response. As of this afternoon almost 82,000 names have been posted.

As a Texan and one who supported President Obama and his re-election I wanted to say publicly and in the best manner a lifelong Texas boy can convey that this whole petition business is a total, 100 percent crock of bullshit.

Those who push the petition, as if it would ever receive any official presidential consideration, have missed the exit for Make-Believe World and are headed for a rapid trip to Delusional City. Why would people who are ticked off due to the election sign a petition to the President? It is his election to begin with that has wound up tightly these people who fancy themselves Texas nationalists. If many thousands of those who put their names on the petition were honest with the rest of us and themselves, their main reason for such a notion is the fact that the President is an African-American. To be exact, he is half black African and half white American, that equals ta-da! an African-American.

The petition “cites blatant abuses” of rights such as the “NDAA, the TSA, etc.” No specific abuses are cited for the condemnation of what I suppose is the National Defense Authorization Act or the Transportation Security Agency. Many of the worries are based on what is heard from the right-wing propaganda machine such as Fox News. Nevertheless, plenty of fanciful rhetoric is spouted on the Texas Nationalist Movement Web site which sees the United States government handing over the keys to the kingdom of Texas and saying “here you go!”

All of this is beyond ludicrous. We will not secede. Even our hare-brained Gov. Good Hair Perry doesn’t advocate such malarkey. He likely only brought it up as a means of snaring some of our nuttier voters for his god-awful presidential campaign. You see where such talk got him.

Face reality, those of you who think breaking off from the United States is a good idea. Any treasonous move to split our country would be met with sharp resistance. As it gradually sinks in that the election is over and Barack Obama won, I imagine such fanciful talking will be much more subdued. I hope so at least.

We Texans are a proud bunch. Yes, I know we can be obnoxious braggarts. But I suspect probably the majority of us also feel equally proud and protective of our country. Yesterday I saw that pride and that love of country reflected in those of us veterans who were graciously served a free meal for Veterans Day by Golden Corral. Vets from Vietnam and World War II as well as peacetime veterans sat by me at my table and not a one, not even the elderly gent from the second World War, failed to stand and salute during the National Anthem.

I also would be willing to bet that most Texans love their state and all of its beauty: From the mountains to the Pineywoods, to the Gulf; to the prairies and to the brush country. But we likewise love the surf of San Diego County, the majestic Rocky Mountains of Colorado, the Gateway Arch of St. Louis, the brass of New Orleans, the multicolored splendor of New England falls and on and on.

I won’t apologize for being a Texan. I will not even apologize for the idiots who believe this great state should break away from this wonderful nation. But I stress that most of us are not like those who are so deluded they probably need some drugs. Come see us in Texas. We’ll have a good time. We’re all Americans here.

Yours truly,

Dick of EFD