Why do we ask why after large news events? Why do you ask?

Why is that Americans must have an explanation for when circumstances go blowing out of our control? Perhaps we have a Why Disorder. But if so, why is that?

Take the recent mega-news stories lately: The Boston Marathon bombing; the West, Texas, fertilizer plant explosion; the retrieval of the three, long-held kidnapped girls-turned-women in Cleveland; the Oklahoma City-area tornadoes. Each one of these scarcely left time for a breath until journalists were seeking the why behind the stories.

* Why didn’t Boston have better planning for the possibility of terrorist attacks, especially during the marathon? What’s with the connection between the dead Boston suspect and a 2011 murder in which the victim, supposedly the marathon bomber’s best friend was allegedly found murdered in Florida and sprinkled with marijuana? THIS STUFF IS FREAKING ME OUT!!!

* Why weren’t residents who lived in the downtown portion of the community of West better informed as to what kind of dangers lurked in their communities?

* Why weren’t the three kidnapped girls found earlier after the suspect had contacts with the police while the girls were being held? Why was the 9-1-1 operator “so mean” to kidnap victim Amanda Berry as she summoned help from police?

* Why aren’t people in Oklahoma City, especially kids in school, better protected with shelters from the ferocious storms that frequent “Tornado Alley,” the area including OKC?

NOAA photo
NOAA photo

These are all fair questions and I don’t fault the journalists with asking such questions, especially when victims or those living in the communities do the asking. Perhaps the timing rubs me the wrong way. The more I stray from my journalist roots, the more I question some of the very practices I once engaged in as a reporter. Or at the very least, some aspects of those practices.

“Get off my lawn,” sez me, the Old Fart.

If you’ve ever tried explaining something complex to members of the general public — tides, animal reproduction, the Consumer Price Index — you might understand that getting to the why isn’t always easy. Yet, often the whys to these type of questions are easier to fathom than “the why to the why.”

When I was growing up, accidents used to happen. Mr. Jones was killed in an automobile accident. Mrs. Jones died of natural causes. That the car Mr. Jones was driving had a blow-out on the right-rear wheel which caused the driver to veer off the road and flipped the car three times after the driver over-corrected was not that important. The fact that he was survived by Mrs. Jones who died from a heart attack the next day and that the funeral for the couple will be tomorrow at 6 p.m. under the direction of Smith’s Morgue was what the locals cared most about.

Since then, we’ve had the 24-hour news cycle, lawsuits, the Internet, Honey Boo Boo and who knows what all.

So if you have questions, here are some news articles that might answer some of the inquiries, that is, from all of you who have come to expect immediate answers. If you are looking for answers from me, look somewhere else might I suggest.

Is anywhere safe in a storm — Slate

Tornado Aftermath — The (Memphis) Commercial Appeal

Gimme Shelter — Mother Nature Network

 

The old sayings about the weather leave us forever wondering

The wind in the great out of doors a short-short ago was slicing like a Saturday evening straight razor. We are supposed to be kissed here abouts 45 miles north of the Gulf of Mexico with sea breezes that gently caress the evening. But alas those winds, like the 30-plus mph gusts that ripped me a new one as I walked out of the office today, were more like a nasal-to-chin sloppy one planted by the town drunk on a suicide mission.

Metaphoric pictures, and not necessarily pleasant ones at that, aside are the “March Crazies” as I call them. It isn’t a particular weather feature but more like a pre-Spring phenomenon that leaves you not knowing whether to fly a kite or tie your ass down to a sturdy oak tree.

The old sayings about the weather leading into Spring have now faded into memory. With the possibility — and for many probability — of intercontinental travel these days could only a meteorologist who has studied weather of areas traversing the big ponds know if these sayings universally hold water, pardon the pun.

Had I not witnessed it myself would I have known the old mariner’s weather verse is as true — many times — on the Big Sur side of the mighty Pacific as it off the Indochina coast looking fore and aft while sailing down the middle of the South China Sea. I once knew what basis in fact was “Red sky at morning, sailors take warning. Red sky at night, sailor’s delight.” Of course, that verse is also as foretelling sometimes as does the old saw: “If your left hand itches, it means you will be blessed with money.” That very circumstance has proven true at times, though just as often as when my left butt cheek itched.

My mother was not overtly superstitious but I think that she loved when these old sayings with which she heard all of her life became a reality. She used to point out “Thunder in February, frost in April.” And I can remember those times more than not.

The most confusing of the old weather sayings has been how “March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb.” Or is it vice versa? At least in my part of the world does the former seem to be the most evident.

As entertaining are these old wise tales does the same go for the completely unpredictable. The wild and sometimes dangerous storms of Spring are still as great a wonder as can be imagined. Were it not so, perhaps L. Frank Baum might have spun an epic story around a blizzard or a drought rather than a tornado which caused a farm house to conk Dorothy on the head and heave her ho out into Oz.

The nugget of wisdom that points out how “April showers bring May flowers” seems as if it is making up for a ruined day, perhaps it is why Johnny had to stay inside. But it is just as true as “April showers bring April flooding.”

Times were back during the recent droughts when it seemed as if it would never rain again. But it did. Like that rainy July 4th I remember. Nothing was ruined for me on that festive day as the blessed steady showers came during a severe rain-free period.

Talk though you may about that weather and say there is nothing that could be done. Someday science may prove that just as empty as some lakes left dry by drought. But I had just as soon weather be left alone with perhaps the great advances in forecasting being a welcome exception. It is those winds that blew from the sea with gusto and which seemed to tear my bones apart likewise provide me a great comfort in its mystery.

 

Asteroids keep falling on my head …

The Ural Mountain region near the Kazakhstan border was the site of undoubtedly many freaked-out Russians Friday as a meteor estimated at 11 tons crashed into Earth. Some 1,100 people were injured from damage caused by shock waves. It was the most powerful such event since 1908 when a meteor fragment hit the Tunguska area in Siberia.

The early 20th century event struck with the power of from five to 30 megatons of TNT, according to scientists. That blast equaled about 1,000 times the power of the atomic bomb dropped by the U.S. over Hiroshima, Japan, in 1945. An estimated 80 million trees were destroyed by the Tunguska event.

Massive numbers of windows were knocked out with shattered glass causing the majority of the injuries from the blast Friday. Many of the damaged buildings were in the town of Chelyabinsk. Scientists said the asteroid affecting the Ural region were unrelated to the DA-14 asteroid which was passing the Earth by 17,500 miles today.

Both the 1908 asteroid and the one falling to Earth today shows our planet with some incredible luck, provided DA-14 doesn’t go wildly off course. Both Russian events occurred near sparsely populated areas. Population also was not a factor with some asteroids through the Earth’s history which which were believed to have had a major influence on the planet ranging from vast changes in fauna to geology.

An asteroid almost 60 million years ago crashed into Earth, forming a “so-called” impact crater, in what is now quiet pasture land outside of Marquez, Texas, (pronounced “mar-KAY”). The town is about 20 miles west of the intersection of Texas Hwy. 7, and Interstate 45, roughly halfway between Dallas and Houston. A good friend of mine wrote a 2004 story about the long-ago asteroid. The story quotes a scientist as saying the Marquez asteroid came crashing to earth with the power of between 10 and 100 hydrogen bombs. It created a crater about 8 miles in diameter and a mile deep. Over time, receding seawater and marsh filled up the crater and turned it into an uplift, or as Professor Arch Reid of the University of Houston said in the story, the crater became turned inside out. There are scientists who believe that a meteor about six miles in diameter killed off the dinosaurs about 65 million years ago.

These occurrences remind us Earthlings that we are just sitting on piece of rock amongst countless others out there in the universe. Space specialists can estimate when a chunk of cosmos might be heading near us, like the DA-14, but pieces from asteroids do not need a humongous size to mess up the rest of our day, or, rest of our whatevers.

California burnin,’ Texas style!

Well if this isn’t a fine how do you do. The state of California is known for its wild fires that get out of control when the Santa Ana winds start blowing and whatever other kinds of natural freaks show up. And now? I don’t know whether the state just doesn’t have enough left to burn or is worried about what is left. But, a California university wants to pay to burn a patch of Texas ground.

Now I know the fire and environmental folks around Houston, where the 115 acres was scheduled for torching during the gusty winds this afternoon, have seen plenty of their own land go up in smoke and flames. Hey, wake up! Remember the disaster last year in Bastrop? Almost 1,700 homes burned up in the county, less than 100 miles away from Houston.

I suppose some of the folks out on the left coast just have money to burn. Break out the Gatorade for the firefighters and some margaritas for the neighbors. This sounds like something Guvnuh Good Hair Perry dreamed up.

 

Texas is full of heroes with nary an umbrella

Business took me to the university today. The weather felt more like late March than late January. Folks have told me that this might be it for winter. This might be Texas but people shouldn’t say the winter is done until it is done.

It has been awhile since I have seen a late winter though.

Not a lot of kids were stirring on the school quadrangle or whatever they call it. The place has a big head of a man who once was a president of the Republic of Texas. The big-headed man has a name. Mirabeau Buonaparte Lamar. I wonder if voters gave him the crap that Obama got from his middle name — Fillmore? Lamar is described as a poet, politician, diplomat and soldier. Hmmm. I wrote poems. I even had some published. So can I be known as a poet? I guess you have to have a big head too. Which makes me wonder …

Did you ever know a man named Umbrella Jones? He had a big head and thus he carried around a big umbrella with which to fit his big head. He had a lot of things in his head. Like Richard Brautigan poems.

Mirabeau Big Head Lamar was accepted to Princeton but instead worked at two failing businesses including a newspaper. When president, Lamar drove the Cherokees from Texas which made him at odds with Sam Houston. The Cherokees liked Big Sam — he has a big statue on Interstate 45 outside of Huntsville, Texas. He has no umbrella. Big Sam had stayed with the Cherokees. They called Sam “the Big Drunk.” Perhaps they knew that one day he would have a big statue. Maybe even the Cherokees saw in their visions that one day a great general with five stars would build what was called the “Interstate System.”

The system would be known at one time for roadside trading posts called “Stuckey’s” with pee-can log rolls and places off the highway where traders and travelers might rest and do the pee pee. But damned if there wasn’t a lack of umbrella.

Lamar was known as the “Father of Education” in Texas. Which makes one wonder who is the Uncle of Education? Or perhaps the Mother’s Half-Brother’s Aunt of Education? Mirabeau later fought in the Mexican-American War and was appointed by President Buchanan, when Texas became a state, as Minister to Nicaragua. Much much later they named this college in Beaumont, Lamar University, after him.

Even though it is nice to have a university in town named after a poet and diplomat, it is much more satisfying to have graduated from a fine school named after the Father of Texas: “Umbrella “Peabody” Jones State College for the Foolish. Just kidding. I was a graduate of the university named after the “real” Father of Texas, Stephen F Austin. I don’t think his head is all that big and he has no statue on the freeway. However, Steve is honored with a life-sized statue of him in front of the library where he is surfing the big waves off Galveston during a hurricane. Good ol’ Surfing Steve. By golly. And wouldn’t you know he forgot his umbrella.