The skies aren’t so scary when the ground is parched

Hey ya'll down there, don't make snow cones from that blue ice!

This is not the sky picture I wanted to show you. Well, I guess it is because I am showing it. I cannot remember where this was taken. Okay, jerk, yes, I know it was taken from an aircraft. Jeez. Leave me alone, will ya?

The truth is I took a couple of shots with my telephone from my office building of the scary-looking/not scary-looking skies this afternoon. Unfortunately, the shot was kind of blurred. I should have bracketed the photo. I had plenty of time. I wasn’t wasting film because I … film, you know, photographic material consisting of a base of celluloid covered with a photographic emulsion; used to make negatives or transparencies.

What sky I was photographing this afternoon was a mass of dark clouds hanging above a clearer horizon. I am not a meteorologist so I don’t know if it was a “wall cloud” of the kind you hear of or see in conjunction with a tornado or severe thunderstorm.

I don’t think our storm this afternoon was severe. The general conditions for a severe thunderstorm, according to NOAA:

“(A) thunderstorm that produces a tornado, winds of at least 58 mph (50 knots), and/or hail at least ¾” in diameter. Structural wind damage may imply the occurrence of a severe thunderstorm. A thunderstorm wind equal to or greater than 40 mph (35 knots) and/or hail of at least ½” is defined as approaching severe.”

Glad I could help. But no doubt it was a thunderstorm because I saw lightning and heard thunder and it rained like a cow pissing on a flat rock. Hell of a visual but that’s what I grew up hearing in East Texas. That and “gully washer” and “frog strangler.” It was raining very abundantly, is what I am saying. And that, my friends, is a good thing because as it is written, we are in the middle of a drought right here in River City, with a capital “d” that rhymes with “p” and that stands for “parchedness.” Which, my friends, means dry. I love “(Ya Got) Trouble” from “The Music Man,” if you hadn’t noticed.

Folks really are having trouble in river cities, such as Minot, N.D., where the Souris River is on a rampage and threatening the city. Worse yet, a rising Missouri River is causing Nuclear Regulatory Commission authorities to keep an eye on two nuclear power plants in Nebraska. Water, water everywhere … Or so it seems.

As I said, we here on the Upper Texas Coast are bone dry. The rains we had today and yesterday, particularly today, were nice. That’s why the threatening sky I wasn’t able to get a good shot of wasn’t all that threatening. Yes, it rained, and rained and rained some more. But it hardly made a noticeable dent in the rainfall deficit which now, thanks to the rain the last couple of days, is just less than 20 inches.

Such extreme lack of rainfall and our geographic proximity to the Gulf of Mexico gets a lot of people, myself included, talking foolish, saying things like: “We need a tropical storm to park off the coast for a week.” Of course, tropical storms have a nasty habit of not minding what we mortals try to tell nature. To paraphrase a great Jimmy Buffet song, there is no trying to reason with hurricane season. But the type of rain a tropical gully washer brings is about what we need.

Radical Texas Republicans in bed with al-Quida?

Are Texas Republican bigwigs holding secret meetings in the Chihuahuan Desert with the likes of Ayman al-Zawahri? Perhaps sneaky little Al-Quida runners are stealthily hauling bags of cash to the likes of Republican Texas State Sen. Dan Patrick or Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst. There must be a logical explanation why Republican lawmakers from the Lone Star State and their Gov. Rick “Good Hair Wants the White House” Perry would want to pass legislation that could trigger more 9/11s. When it comes to Republicans in Texas, hell anywhere for that matter, the motive must be money.

I jest, a little bit at least. But Perry has resurrected a previously dead bill he wants passed in the Special Session of the Texas Legislature which would make it a crime for airport security personnel in the state’s airports to “grope” passengers.

The bill failed in the Regular Session. But that was before Perry started believing that he could get elected president. Patrick, who is a Houston right-wing talk show host, is staring at the U.S. Senate seat of retiring Republican Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison. So this anti-federal government legislation would certainly provide “red meat” — a term that is so hackneyed that I can’t believe I am using it — for the nutwing base.

Justice Department officials rained on the radical GOP’s crazy parade during the regular legislative session when they told state officials that Texas airports could be shut down if such a law was passed. Apparently Patrick and Perry — meet the Killer Ps — think the feds are bluffing. We’ll see when the closest airport to Houston to fly out of is in Lake Charles, La.

Whether it is a bluff is debatable. But the radicals see such a law as a stepping stone to a big Constitutional battle. But even as backward and anti-American as the Roberts Supreme Court is at the moment, I can’t see the high court passing a bill that would almost guarantee incidents of terrorism.

We don’t have to worry about just shoe bombs and groin bombs and box cutters either. No, al-Quida has apparently decided they like them some National Rifle Association rhetoric, if not the ability to buy guns through the gun shows the mega-lobby supports.

Adam Gadahn, an American spokesman for Al-Quida, said in a video that the U.S. is “awash with easily obtainable firearms.” Gadahn, whose grandfather was a prominent Jewish doctor but Gadahn himself grew up Protestant Christian, said those who are seeking jihad can go to a gun show and purchase fully automatic weapons without a background check and probably minus even an ID card. In other words, Gadahn, who is also on the FBI terrorism list, is giving people ideas.

Gadahn: If this guy asks you to go with to the local gun show, just say "no."

Now the NRA backers say that kind of talk is all wrong, that you can’t just go buy a fully-auto machine gun at your local convention center. You can purchase a semi-auto assault rifle though. You might even buy the works to turn those guns into fully automatic.

Hey, I’m not anti-gun. But I am anti-terrorists-with-guns. Likewise, I am anti-terrorists with bombs, knives, box cutters or whatever in wherever on their body and most certainly on an airplane.

These Republicans who think every Fed is out to get them are doing so with legislation such as the “anti-groping” bill that might potentially, once again, turn big jet airplanes full of passengers into bombs that kill thousands. I have seen and heard of some silly stuff brought up by Republicans over the years. But those folks who came up with and are pushing the anti-groping legislation — yes, that slick Aggie cheerleader with the perfect hair included — are among the silliest sons of bitches in the anals (no, it’s not a misspelling) of Texas history.

Summertime and the living’s smoky

Tomorrow is the start of Summer. You could have fooled me. What was all this hot, dry weather we’ve been through, it seems like forever?

The National Weather Service says our official weather station, the Jack Brooks Regional Airport in Nederland, Texas, reports that average rainfall for the county is down by 20.06 inches since Jan. 1, 2011. It’s been hot, too. That isn’t so unusual for this time of year. It is windy as it sometimes can be just off the Gulf Coast. The extreme dryness from the drought has brought about wildfires in this and other parts of Texas as well as a good chunk of the Southwest. Just a spark is all the dry grasses need, plus a little of the Gulf breeze turned into a heavy gust of wind and you have yourselves a conflagration.

Authorities say a wheel bearing started what is said to be the second-largest fire in East Texas history. The Texas Forest Service said today that the now-named “Bearing” fire has burned about 14,000 acres along the Trinity and Polk county line. That is almost 90 miles northeast of Houston. Two homes were burned and dozens have been evacuated, the forest service said, adding that the fire is about 40 percent contained.

A couple of good ol’ boys doing some target practicing on propane bottles sparked a wildfire near Sam Rayburn Reservoir dam in Jasper County. That is about 120 miles northeast of Houston and about 50 miles west of Fort Polk, La., if you are Army or ex-Army. I am ex-Navy, by the way. The fellow heading emergency management in the area of that fire said about 4,000 acres and seven camp houses were destroyed. I happen to know that emergency management guy up there in Jasper, Sabine and Newton counties. He is a guy named Smith. I think they named a cough drop after he and his four brothers. Smith also said there were some worries about some electricity outages because of fires being close to power lines. I suppose that had something to do with the fire being named the “Power Line” fire.

I have seen droughts, hot weather all in a tiresome combination to start huge wildfires. They don’t just happen in remote areas where ne’er-do-wells are target practicing with possible explosives in an area that is dry as “all get out.” All get out is a technical term used in East Texas meaning “really freaking dry.” I remember back in the summer of ’98, in the last century, when some big crowning fires burned right inside the city limits of Waco. The local fire department there along with help from multi-governmental federal and state firefighters staged at the Texas State Technical College Airport got on that fire which threatened to take a good part of Cameron Park and did a great job of getting the blaze under control before it did more harm. I have said here before and I will say it again. I lived and worked in Waco for seven years. I met a lot of really nice people. Although I never really cared for the place, Waco had a few marvelous spots and Cameron Park was definitely a crown jewel.

Today, here in Southeast Texas, the weather has been more like a normal summer day you would experience. The high temp was about 90 degrees. There was about a 20 percent to 30 percent chance of rain today. Looking at the radar earlier, I would say the coverage was much greater although what we got today was literally a drop in the bucket. Starting tomorrow there is a pretty good chance of rain for a couple of days, up to 70 percent. That would be nice to get some substantial rain. But, says meteorologist Jonathan Brazzell, of the National Weather Service office in Lake Charles, La., “Rainfall amounts will in no way end the current drought. It should provide some short term relief on the order of a few days to a week.”

In the meantime, if you are interested in keeping up with what’s going on in Texas and elsewhere with the wildfires here are some good sites:

Texas Forest Service — It gives a summary of each day’s fires and numbers in Texas.

U.S. Forest Service Remote Sensing Applications Center — Dandy little site with various interactive maps showing wildfires throughout the county.

InciWeb — The Incident Information System gives a plethora of information on this searchable site that includes Google maps pinpointing the location of these fires.

These are only a few and as loaded with great info, they aren’t a substitute for someone at the scene reporting, blogging through Facebook — like my volunteer firefighter nieces do when they can —  their observations, or perhaps Tweeting. For all those brave souls on the fire lines, my best wishes that you all come home safe. I also extend those best wishes for those who live or have property threatened by fire. And a word to others, use your common sense if you have a smidgen of it somewhere. Where it is dry, all it takes is a spark to cause a disaster.

Happy Summer.

Coyotes beware. Rick Perry’s in the hunt. For something or other.

Shortly after I all but anointed Jon Huntsman Jr. as the Great White Hope of the 2012 Republican presidential crop, up pops our own Texas Gov. Good Hair Perry everywhere lookin’ as if he is going to put his dung-covered cowboy boots in the race.

That’s right, Rick did it all because of me. He said: “I’m gonna get that s**t-bird reporter who suggested to my press guy during a visit to Fort Hood that I get photographed riding on a tank like Mike Dukakis.”

News has been mixed to say the least at Perry feeling out the GOP nomination trail.

“The field is already pretty full,” said Texas Mr. Republican Sen. John Cornyn. He praised Perry’s abilities, yadda, yadda, yadda, but he said he’d leave it up to Perry as to whether he should run.

I mean, read the whole thing in the Houston Chronicle, but the gist is that it doesn’t sound like Big Bad John is all in for Good Hair.

The man who was the de facto head of the Republican Party awhile back, Rush Limburger, wants Perry to run. That endorsement should be enough to make any sane man or woman stop and say: “Whoa, pardner!”

Of course, a lot of the Texas media want to go hit the national campaign trail even though they may be riding buses instead of flying on big old jet airliners.

Perry is beginning to look like one of those, albeit washed-up, television evangelists what with his all of a sudden turning on of religiosity. But Rick is the same old Rick he’s been since, at least he was, lieutenant governor. He is a slick Willie. Maybe he doesn’t cheat on his wife or text his private parts to young women but some of the things Perry has done — Google Rick Perry — make him more fit as a used car salesman (sorry, I didn’t mean to insult used car salesmen) than as governor and certainly as president. They shoot coyotes don’t they?

Perry might end up as the bookend to a Jon Huntsman Jr. ticket that I spoke of yesterday or whomever else might end up wearing the GOP throne. Let’s hope that will be the contribution Rick Perry makes to the national Republican effort, one as a VP candidate. Then, let’s hope and make an effort to ensure he and whomever he pairs with loses the race. And if the Republicans win and Rick Perry ends up vice president, maybe some prayers will be in order for that president’s continuing health.

 

Aides “Newtloose” so where does this leave Rick and Dog on Man?

Well, it looks like advisers of Newt Gingrich took a vote of no-confidence as most of the aides walked on the former House speaker and current candidate for GOP presidential nomination. Since two of the aides have what The Texas Tribune calls “extensive links” to our good-haired Gov. Rick Perry, the star-powered non-profit Web site puts A + B together to get a capital C, which rhymes with P and that stands for Perry. (With apologies to Meredith Wilson, even though he’s been gone for quite awhile now.)

Just because Newt had a massive ship abandoning and some of those jumping are former Perry guys that adds to the “rampant speculation that Gov. Rick Perry will scoop them up to launch his own White House bid,according to a Tribune story by veteran Austin reporter Jay Root.

Don’t get me wrong. I think Jay Root, former Associated Press and Fort Worth Star-Telegram capitol reporter, is one of the best state government reporters and definitely one of the best writers covering the subject. I just think it’s a little weak to make such speculations.

Maybe Good Hair, after this and perhaps more Special Sessions of the Texas Legislature this year, will decide to throw in his hat. It just musses up that purty coiffure anyway. But I don’t think such a leap as is being made due to the Newt-fection, which Root tags as “speculation” in any event, is warranted at 4:01 p.m. CDT, June 9, 2011. Or 4:02 p.m. CDT, …

It does not take much of a hop, skip or jump to surmise that the mass defection might have had more to do with Newt being a weak, turned weakened and particularly unattractive candidate. That also is not to say Rick Perry would be a stronger or particularly appealing Republican presidential aspirant. As a matter of fact, I can’t think of two more less appealing candidates for president or even dog catcher to represent any party.

So at least for the moment, I would say the tote board shows: Gingrich defection 1, Perry probably < 1. But, I live in Beaumont and not Austin, so what do I know?

Oh, and speaking of another possible GOP hopeful — this one actually makes me feel sorry for the Republican Party — former Sen. Rick “Man on DogSantorum declared today that climate change is “junk science.” That’s not so surprising especially since Rush Limbaugh — on whose show this “great man of science Santorum” made such a proclamation, has a jihad against the scientific notion of climate change. However, GOP candidate and former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney told a town hall meeting in New Hampshire last week that he thinks the Earth is warming and as a result of human activity. I suppose the GOP has got that “big tent” thing working.

And, I take it back, I can think of an equally unappealing candidate for president as Rick Santorum. Move over Newt and Good Hair.