Category: Texas

Since I started writing here more than five years ago I have managed to heap quite a bit of scorn and whatever else I had handy for our well-coiffed Texas Gov. Rick “Good Hair” Perry.

First there was George W. then Perry that have been both a national and a personal pain in the ass for me. The latter is in part because I had to cover both governors as a reporter and neither were particularly inspiring either as subjects of newspaper articles nor as “statesmen.” I think the last time I covered an event with Perry as governor shows about how interesting he was to write about.

I can’t exactly remember where I was but it was somewhere in Central Texas. Some kind of “pollution-abating” dog-and-pony-show was going on and Rick Perry was there as governor to lend a sis-boom-bah to the event. After all the presentations were made and a few words were said by each of the speakers, including the governor, Good Hair himself asked the some half-dozen reporters if they had any questions.

“No, not really,” I told  him. None of the other reporters there asked the governor anything as well, following my lead. I would like to think part of the reason is that the other media members were just waiting for me to write something so they could steal it. Nevertheless, that is the first time I think that I ever saw the media fail to ask questions of a governor — not to mention a governor of the state with both the second-largest size and population in the country —  given the opportunity.

Perhaps now that Good Hair is on a bigger stage, seeking the Republican presidential nomination as he seems to be, every opportunity he gives to ask a question is a big deal to the media. That, and the fact that he seems to only do his talking to friendlies such as Fox News these day. I write these words as Perry is pushing a whole lot of red meat subjects for his “conservative base” (God, I hate those words almost as much as I despise the phrase “win-win.”) for the start of the new Texas legislative session. Anti-abortion, anti-immigrant, support for a federal Constitutional amendment for a balanced budget and so forth are all on his plate. All of these Perry considers as “emergencies” for the Lege to consider.

What an inspiring guy that Good Hair is. I wish he would get caught sleeping with an underage, gay horse.

An eye-opener ran into today’s Federaltimes.com, the WWWebbed Gannett federal government version of the franchise that also publishes Navy Times, Army Times, etc., as well as USA Today.

Note: I always give you more information than you need. It’s your decision to do with it what you want.

It seems our Republican congressional members have indulged themselves in a race to destroy the federal government and, while they are at it, put our economy further in shambles.

One of our East Texas congressmen is in that contest. U.S. Rep. Kevin Brady, (a South Dakotan by birth — You decide, I type), has introduced a bill that would freeze federal pay raises for three years instead of the two that our president proposed. Brady, who represents the “deep” in Deep East Texas, also wants to cut the federal work force by 10 percent. That’s about 200,000 in RIFs, “early retirements” and so forth.

Not be outdone, Rep. Jim Jordan, R-Ohio and Sen. Jim DeMint (with the not so fresh taste), a S.C. Republican, wants to cut the federal rolls by 15 percent and freeze pay increases for five years.

Shouting: “I’ll see your stinking 15 percent and raise  you two weeks without pay in FY 2012 for those lazy no-goods!” is Rep. Mike Coffman, R-Whatelse from Colorado.

Why stop there? Why not just do away with the federal work force altogether? All together: “Why not just do … ”

And the federal government? And the United States of America? And Smokey the Bear? Why don’t we do away with all governments? Yes, let us have anarchy?

It is really difficult to tell how much that all of this is these folks trying to put on a show for their constituents at Fox News.

But if Mr. Brady and his Bunch really wants to impress the Hannitys and the Limburgers and the Palines and get their names and talking heads on the Fox, perhaps they should put their money that they will cause to be in short supply once they are done, where their mouths are.

Mr. Brady, Mr. Breath Mint, and ilk, why not:

*  Serve a single term in Congress for the token sum of $1.

*  Get your health insurance and that of their family elsewhere. No more insurance.

*  No free trips around the World to all those junkets. You want to travel, you pay for it. No local travel either. No staff travel because  you will have no staff!

*  Better figure out how you are going to live after Congress. You will get no pension.

*  No free parking or getting ahead in line. That’s over buster!

* Oh all those things that your constituents think that need to be done, you’ve got to do them. “Cut my lawn. Go invade China. Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran.” And if you don’t do what we say the way we like it, we will kick you out on your arse without any justification. Then where will you be, having spent  that big dollar you are paid.

In short, if you take 200,000 to 300,000 out of the federal work force you will take away quite a few dollars from this economy only making the situation worse. I’m not sure how many bucks would be taken away from taxes and money going to merchants and airlines and car companies and banks and insurance, by God, by giving federal workers two weeks unpaid leave. However, I figure you will pretty soon be talking some serious dollars.

Should any of these harebrained ideas be adopted by Congress I hope that the congressional sponsors such as Kevin Brady, University of South Dakota grad and now bringing his “Christian” values to East Texas — they’re running short I’m sure — will take credit for the failure their ideas will produce. But ‘fessin’ up? I don’t see that happening.

U.S. Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison, R-Texas, announced today she will not seek a fourth term. That isn’t so surprising since she took a 51-30 percent thrashing by Gov. Rick “Goodhair” Perry in the 2010 Republican Primary. And make no mistake about it, Kay Bailey Hutchison is a Republican, By God! Her people let me know it in a heartbeat once when I mistakenly put a “D” after her name in a newspaper story. That is really kind of petty when you think about it. It was in a small-medium-sized newspaper and the “real” folks outside the Beltway,  with more time on their hands than sense and who always search for that kind of thing in the paper would have been sure to call me up so Kay’s gestapo needn’t have spent the taxpayers money on such bulls**t.

That’s a bit harsh. Kay’s people aren’t gestapo they are just probably so afraid that Kay is going to whack them with a big stick that they leave nothing to chance.

When you make the rounds in Texas newspapers for a number of  years you are bound to see some politicians again and again. Such was the case with George “Gee Dubya” Bush who I watched before my very eyes transform from a Major League Asshole Baseball executive to governor to president. With Kay, I watched her become Texas State Treasurer and later U.S. Senator. Politicians, I’ve seen a few.

Kay has done some good at the local level, delivering the pure pork sausage so ably she must’ve made Jimmy Dean jealous. That’s not a slam on Kay, that’s actually a compliment. I have also seen her not do what she could do to help at the state and local level, until she was pushed. At the national level, she was a bit to the left of George Bush and John Cornyn, but way the hell to the right of Olympia Snowe. I’m not sure what all is going on with her personally. Pro-choice on abortion, the senator and her husband adopted two children in 2001 so that may have influenced some of her political activity.

Republican Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst is called “the 800-pound gorilla in the room” when it comes to replacing Hutchison. We shall see. I would bet on him and half a dozen more Republicans before ponying up on a Democrat. I’m not even sure a Democrat Party exists in Texas anymore. If there is, will you please write? Two of us can be one hell of a force!