Japan's Aso suffers from foot-in-mouth disease


Advice to Japanese PM:

If you don’t have something

good to say about some group

then shut the f**k up!

Granted, I don’t know much about Japanese politics. But if the art/science/blood sport is anything like it is in much of the world then that nation’s prime minister should know enough not to piss off large constituencies.

But piss off folks PM Taro Aso did when he complained about the elderly spending too much tax money by going to the doctor. An Associated Press story said:

“They’re hobbling around and constantly going to the doctor,” Prime Minister Taro Aso was quoted as saying in a transcript of a Nov. 20 meeting of ministers on economic policies.

Who is next on his list? Babies?

The 68-year-old Aso — not exactly a young whipper-snapper — apologized for his remarks about old folks. But he has been noted for his verbal gaffes since taking office in September. He complained to a crowd in October that his job as PM has cut into his favorite past time of reading comics. At least he has a safe constituency there.

Fiscally sick Pilgrim gets Thanksgiving reprieve


Bo Pilgrim is not looking for chicken feed.

Although turkey is the bird of today the nation’s largest chicken processor is giving thanks to lenders for once again keeping them out of bankruptcy court.

Pittsburg, Texas-based Pilgrim’s Pride reached an agreement with lenders “to extend the temporary waiver under its credit facilities through noon (CT) on December 1, 2008,” according to a company news release. Pilgrims operates numerous facilities from eastern Texas throughout the south as well as in Mexico, where it is that country’s 2nd largest chicken producer. Viva pollo!

The credit extension is the third Pilgrim’s has been granted in recent months. Among its problems is debt, the high cost of chicken feed and a rather fowl glut. Yuk, yuk.

Company Sr.board chairman Lonnie “Bo” Pilgrim became well-known throughout Texas for his TV commercials where he delivered his deadpan drawl and dressed in a pilgrim’s get up while hawking his chickens. His most well-known line on the commercials was undoubtedly: “I just won’t sell a fat, yellow chicken.” Pilgrim later became even better known for handing out $10,000 checks to Texas legislators inside the State Capitol.

It makes one wonder now, given the company’s financial woes, if Pilgrim didn’t wish he would have hung on to those checks.

Something different for Thanksgiving dinner

Food writer Regina Schrambling on Slate the other day wrote how grueling it can be coming up with some kind of different take on Thanksgiving dinner each year. Said Schrambling:

“What makes me totally crazy is the persistent pressure to reinvent a wheel that has been going around quite nicely for more than 200 years. Every fall, writers and editors have to knock themselves out to come up with a gimmick—fast turkey, slow turkey, brined turkey, unbrined turkey—when the meal essentially has to stay the same. It’s like redrawing the Kama Sutra when readers really only care about the missionary position.”

That’s a great metaphor — food and sex or vice versa.

I felt the same way when I worked for daily newspapers and was faced with some reoccurring event which causes both reporter and editor great consternation over doing something “unique” this year. Too often though, it just doesn’t work out. That’s why both on local TV and community newspapers you will see stories about firefighters having their Thanksgiving dinner interrupted by a call but they return and everyone has a wonderful meal. Actually — having had the fortune of a past life both as a firefighter and reporter — I can say for a fact that the bells going off screws up more dinners than one might think. I don’t know what firemen did before microwave ovens.

Were I having to write a local Thanksgiving food story today, though, I think I know where I could find something a little different. Although, as Schrambling points out in her column, even an ethnic story such as I am about to relate often joins the trite parade when trying to be different. Nonetheless, here it is: Soul Thanksgiving.

During my daily walk a short while ago one of my route friends and I exchanged Thanksgiving greetings. The man, an African-American, mentioned he was having smoked coon (or raccoon for you perfectionists)tomorrow for his Thanksgiving meal. Now I point out the fact that the man is African-American because coon is considered a delicacy among some of the more rural, or rural-raised, blacks here in East and Southeast Texas.

I remember my father saying he ate coon in his younger days (he grew up in the Depression so he may also have eaten Hoover Hog, a nickname for an armadillo in the wake of Herbert Hoover) and he spoke of blacks in my hometown eating the masked mammal.

Once, I do recall as a child going with my dad to an old black man’s house on some holiday occasion for some reason or another and seeing a coon cooking in a big pot on top of a pot-bellied stove. But I never knew of anyone other than rural African-Americans from my area eating coon until I was in college.

The one time I ate coon was on Super Bowl Sunday 1986. My friend JK had a Super Bowl party and our friend Pete barbecued some coons. As I recalled, it was pretty good. If I am not mistaken Pete — who was also in college — had been trapping some coons for fur. So he also brought some along for the half-time show.

My next coon-as-food encounter — although I didn’t partake — was about six years ago. I was driving on Texas Hwy. 87 south of Newton (in deepest of Deep East Texas) and at the Bleakwood crossroads I spotted a man who had signs out beside his pickup advertising “Shrimp” and “Coon.” Naturally, I turned around and went to have a chat with the man.

The coon salesman — yes, an African-American in case you were wondering — was a little suspicious of me at first. He said that he had the necessary state permit to sell the coon for meat, but whether he did or not I didn’t know nor did I care. Apparently, there only is a short period of time during which raccoon meat can be sold, the coon salesman told me, and one must have a permit to sell the butchered coon. This fellow also told me that his two biggest occasions for selling coon was New Year’s and Super Bowl. Who knew that we were in vogue all those years ago eating coon during a Super Bowl party?

If you read this it might be too late to get a coon for Thanksgiving but if you decide sometime later that you would like to try it, here is a recipe for smoked coon such as my neighborhood friend is having tomorrow.

Regardless whether you are having coon, turkey, ham, cabrito or bologna sandwiches tomorrow, do have happy Thanksgiving.

Just say "woof"

One occasionally hears of a police department coming under scrutiny after some officer or civilian pilfers the confiscated drug stash. But here is a new one, to me at least.

Police here in Beaumont are investigating the theft of the anesthetic drug ketamine from the local animal shelter. The drug is used for several veterinary purposes including sedating an animal before it being euthanized, according to a report on the investigation by local station KBMT-12 in Beaumont.

One anti-drug site noted an alarming trend nationally of animal clinics being robbed for ketamine and also says the drug’s street names include “Vitamin K” or “Cat Valium.”

“An alarming number of veterinary clinics continue to be targeted by thieves seeking Ketamine, a drug prized on the club scene for its euphoric and hallucinatory effects. The robberies follow a similar pattern: one or more people show up with a sickly looking dog, usually without an appointment, Ketamine is then demanded from the veterinarian at gunpoint.” Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association, September 15, 2001

The TV report said local police are on the lookout for sexual assault cases in which ketamine might have been used as a date rape drug. Ketamine is known for producing hallucinogenic effects similar to PCP and LSD, according to the anti-drug site. It is also a primary cause of a condition known as “hot dog fingers.” Not really. I stole that from an E-Trade television commercial.