Author: Dick

The real Army on alert in Iraq. They don’t bring the bucks home like the mercenaries but they still do their jobs.

U.S. Ambassador to Iraq Ryan “Tumbleweed” Crocker has his posse saddled up and riding shotgun again in Baghdad. The U.S. mercenary force, a.k.a. Blackwater USA, is undertaking “mission-essential” operations for the U.S. Embassy in Baghdad, according to the State Department. This comes after the controversial private security firm was suspended in the wake of an incident involving their employees in which between 10 and 20 Iraqi citizens were killed.

One thing that can be said for the highly-paid mercenaries, many of whom are ex-Special Forces operators, and that is they put a high value on money.

Remember that dreadful and enraging incident in Fallujah in which four Blackwater employees were burned and dragged through the streets? Well, Blackwater certainly didn’t forget because the men apparently failed in to meet their contractual obligations with the company. The families sued the company so Blackwater decided to play hardball and sue for $10 million the estates of those killed. Hey, it’s only business and nothing personal says Blackwater. They say they are only trying through “arbitration to enforce its contracts with the four deceased men,” said a Blackwater USA news release.

The company has taken much heat from many corners including past and present military personnel who make or made only a fraction of what Blackwater operators make for often just as dangerous or more dangerous missions. But one must ask: How can you show disgust for a company that not only can take over small countries on their own but also sell a bunch of great-looking shit to wear?

Blackwater’s Web site features the “Proshop” where guys can purchase a “Blackwater Bear T-shirt” for just $15 or the gals can get a cool pink V-neck shirt with the company logo, also for the low, low price of $15. There is even a “babys onesies” with the ever-present Blackwater logo for the infant at the outrageously low price of only $18. I mean, I don’t know if the Army can match that.

Well, many free-market Republicans and even Democrats have for years pushed for privatization. And it is running pretty freely within many sectors of government these days. For instance, Carson Wagonlit, the mega agents of travel handle all the travel processing and paperwork for the federal agency which I work for on a part-time basis. Blackwater and the firms like it in Iraq and Afghanistan are just carrying the privatization thing to the Nth degree. That makes me think: “What if we just turn our entire military over to private enterprise?”

There would be no buck privates polishing rocks in boot camps and no Navy recruit would ever again have to fiddle with mess cooking when arriving on ship because the Navy hired their own contractors to run things. Why perhaps even the terrorists could hire their own private armies and let the guys getting the big bucks blow themselves to hell for awhile. The rest of us could all just sit back and relax.

Ahhh, aren’t free-market economies the cat’s pajamas?

One of the least appealing portions of modern-day politics to me is the abject silliness that is projected by the parties. For example, the recent hoopla over the MoveOn.Org ad that suggested Gen. David Petraeus was betraying his country by giving a report to Congress on Iraq that was favorable to the Bush administration’s position. Was such an attack stupid? Absolutely. Should a clever party hack try to capitalize off such an obvious mistake in judgement? Yes, but to a point. Am I trying to sound like Donald Rumsfeld? No I certainly am not trying but it regrettably is coming out that way.

The point is that the parties just keep saying the same damn thing over and over and over until you want to put a .357 hollow point through your TV screen. Enough already.

So the latest stupid political comment which is and will be hammered as long as possible comes from our old friend Rep. Peter King, R-N.Y., the waste of legislative space that “Slate” media critic Jack Shafer called “an exploding carbuncle masquerading as a member of Congress.”

King, who is the homeland security adviser to the Rudy Giuliani presidential campaign, is in hot water over a comment he made in which he said there were “too many mosques” in the U.S.

Now granted King’s comment will likely not trigger such emotion from the Republicans as MoveOn’s idiocy inflamed both Democrats and Republicans alike. But it is a very stupid thing for a U.S. congressman to say anytime and especially these days. And that is no matter if his remarks were taken out of context, which he and most politicians say when something stupid comes from their lips, or they were not.

Predictably and rightly, the Democratic National Convention, has issued a statement saying Guiliani should fire King and that the congressman should apologize.

“This type of bigoted language has no place in public discourse, especially from the Republican’s top lawmaker on the House Homeland Security Committee,” said Democratic National Committee press secretary Stacie Paxton.

The Democrats went on to say that King should be boiled in oil, dipped in batter and fed to hungry orphans in Darfur. Only kidding.

Would I like to see something help put Rudy the Walking Ego in a negative light? You bet. Would I like to see Peter King exiled to Mexico City? Damn right. But I would much rather see the two parties talking something about issues and trying to fix what’s wrong with this freaking country! Of course, I know what they say about wishes …

Avast yer toils and grab yer grog. It’s International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Yes it is once again time to dress like your favorite buccaneer and make your enemies walk the plank. You can celebrate in many ways as the official Talk Like A Pirate Day guys explain here.

As it stands I don’t know what I will do today in order to celebrate. Perhaps I might tie some scurvy dog to the yardarms. That is provided I can find some yardarms. I don’t think it will be too difficult to find me a scurvy dog (and no I do not mean to tie an actual dog to anything.)

So party till the gentlemen o’ fortune come home and always wear your life preserver. ARRRRRRRR.

Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., poses with two future cabinet members on a campaign swing in her quest for Democratic presidential nominee.

Some people may think Hillary Clinton is on the right track with her new health care plan which would require all Americans to have health insurance. I am not one of those people.

First of all, too little specificity is out there about how such a plan would operate and more importantly so is the question of what happens to those who would inevitably fall through the cracks.

Under the Clinton plan the cost of health insurance would be on a percentage of income. That makes me wonder, what percentage might that be?

Requiring health insurance is reminiscent of being required to carry liability on your automobile. Some people can’t afford the mainstream companies so they have to rely on companies who offer cheaper coverage but who knows just how those carriers would react if you actually had an accident and had to rely on that coverage.

And what would become of my coverage? I receive health care through the Department of Veterans Affairs. But the closest VA hospital is 90 miles away so if I have to go to the emergency room I must go to a private hospital and the VA will only pay under certain circumstances. Usually, the VA will try to get out of paying for your ER visit. In the meantime, the hospital, the emergency physician, the radiologist and the cardiologist all are sending you bills or turning your account over to collection agencies while you either wait for the VA to pay or you appeal their decision. I am in the process of trying to get the VA to pay bills for three ER visits over the past two years. They have so far denied two of my claims and I have appealed those decisions.

So health insurance for everyone sounds good but so would presidential candidates saying, if they are elected, each adult will be given a million dollars and every kid would get a pony.

With the crop of presidential candidates on both sides, it seems I may once again have to write in Willie Nelson’s name on the ballot.

So much is going on these days to ridicule and so little time …

The Ojays

Remember that song by the Ojays, “The Back Stabber?” Well, that is not what I aim to discuss briefly. It’s the other OJ, or as his Clark County, Nev., jail record reads:

02648927 SIMPSON, ORENTHAL J 60 Black Male
ASSAULT WITH A DEADLY WEAPON
ASSAULT WITH A DEADLY WEAPON
ROBBERY WITH A DEADLY WEAPON
ROBBERY WITH A DEADLY WEAPON
BURGLARY WITH USE OF DEADLY WEAPON
CONSP ROBBERY WITH A DEADLY WEAPON

There isn’t much to see on the jail record other than the above but if you want to check it out, go here and enter “Simpson.” You’ll get Orenthal if he is still in custody or perhaps even Bart and Homer.

Gee Dubya names new A Gee

U.S. District Judge Michael Mukasey, chief judge of the Southern New York district, was nominated today to be Gee Dubya’s third attorney general. The last two picks were stone cold losers so, for the sake of the nation, let’s hope the third one is a charm. But somehow I doubt it.

Speaking of three-time losers

One thing I can say about the Grand Old Party is that they certainly have a plethora of choices when it comes to potential presidential candidates. Now that is even more the case since Alan Keyes has decided on a third (most likely failing) try for the Republican presidential nomination.

He was a GOP throw-down candidate in the Illinois senate race in which Barack Obama beat Keyes by almost 45 points, or as football coaches here in Texas like to say, “beaten like a rented mule.” I almost feel sorry for him but Keyes is a grown man and he should learn from his mistakes — if not three times then perhaps from a fourth.