Author: Dick

Why not Cooter?

It appears that former U.S. Sen. Fred Dalton Thompson, who plays the district attorney on “Law and Order,” will seek the GOP presidential nomination. Why not? The more, the merrier.

Thompson actually has some experience in Congress so there’s that. Nonetheless, he joins a crowded field of some of the least exciting politicians (on both sides of the aisle)since the Ross Perot/James Stockdale ticket. Thompson isn’t exactly greased lightning himself.

It seems only fair that since the Republicans are going to have an actor in the race, then perhaps the Democrats should as well. So who could they pick?

Well, Ben Jones, who played Cooter on the “Dukes of Hazard” is probably available. He was a democratic congressman from Georgia from 1989-93. Also during that era, some of Iowa’s voters sent Fred Grandy, “The Love Boat’s” Gopher, to the U.S. House as a Republican although he failed in a bid for governor of that state. Isn’t the political world hilarious?

If you go with present-day actors, then Martin Sheen and Geena Davis should be considered because they have experience playing president on television. I would like to see Martin Sheen elected president just because of all the crap that his son, Charlie Sheen, might get into. That would be a journalist’s dream.

Actually, if both sides dressed up a pair of chimpanzees and ran them against each other, they would provide more excitement and vision than all those who are in the hunt for president at the present. Hell, you wouldn’t even have to dress them up.

J

Does anyone have a cheap laptop for sale? I determined that it wouldn’t be worth the money to repair my old machine. So I am looking for a used, refurbished or whatever kind of laptop that won’t break the bank. In the meantime, I guess I’ll be using those at the public library or at the local Internet cafe for $7.20 an hour. I see that staring me in the face at this very moment. It says:

“Computer Usage: $7.20 an hour.”

It is rather foreboding, kind of like the Hazmat placards on rail cars and tractor trailers with the ominous skull and crossbones. Get me outta here!

Alas, my cheap but faithful laptop seems to have entered a state of Murphy’s Law. That is an uncertain but probable diagnosis. Oh well, if it is a worse-case scenario it remains the best $250 I have spent in recent years. I figured if the rebuilt machine made it through the aftermath of Hurricane Rita and one year afterwards I will have spent my money wisely (for once). Indeed, it made it past September 2006. But I shall not yet sound the knell for my trusted little machine. It is time to get out the screwdrivers. But first I’ve got to buy some orange juice. Have a happy and safe Memorial Day.

Some call ours a “nanny” society. Those who do so, most often derisively, often point toward the many laws which may have good intentions but either should not be statutory or are just plain silly. Sometimes these well-intentioned actions result in adverse consequences.

This is mentioned because of my belief that a bill headed toward passage in the Texas Legislature was introduced with hopes of preventing problems with supposed addicting prescription medication such as Soma, Xanax or Lortab. These drugs form a so-called “pain cocktail” given to patients by some pain management specialists.

A number of pain clinics, which local law enforcement officers claim have popped up recently in Southeast Texas, apparently have exclusively given the aforementioned pain cocktail drugs to patients who may be “doctor shopping.” That term, for those who might not know or are too wasted to remember, refers to the practice of patients seeking different physicians so that they may easily be written prescriptions for the pain cocktail and other drugs such as Oxycontin. Authorities had alleged that such a practice had been used by Rush Limbaugh for his Oxycontin addiction but found a lack of evidence and the great windbag got a plea bargain.

Some pharmacists in Southeast Texas have refused to fill new prescriptions for patients who use what they see as essentially pain pill mills. Pharmacists say they are taking a hit moneywise in order to prevent addiction and practices by some addicts such as armed robbery or burglary to get their meds. The Texas Medical Board is also cracking down on some of the doctors who run some of the alleged pill mills.

Those affected pharmacists in Southeast Texas, along with area law enforcement, thought legislation was required to curb what they see as widespread pill-shopping from running rampant.

Luckily for them, the Texas Legislature just happens to be meeting these days in Austin. So, a bill was introduced by area lawmakers, state Sen. Tommy Williams and Rep. Mike Hamilton, both Republicans, that would tighten up the prescription drug laws. Under the law, doctors would be required to report so-called “Schedule III” drugs such as Xanax and Soma, to the Texas Department of Public Safety. The DPS would monitor the patterns of such prescriptions and who knows where that will go.

While this bill may have been introduced with good intentions, I can’t help but wonder if it will produce unintended consequences which might harm a lot of people.

As one who suffers from chronic pain, I think the situation already exists which make getting which drugs one needs (pardon my English) a pain in the ass.

My medication is the highly-addictive and tightly-controlled methadone. I must go to a doctor once a month to get my prescription refilled. There is no calling the doc to phone in a prescription if I run short. Of course, I go to the Department of Veterans Affairs for treatment where getting a doctor to call you back or call in a medication is almost an impossibility as it is.

If I wasn’t treated by the VA, I wonder how much someone like myself with no insurance would pay for a doctor’s visit each month and prescriptions? Or, would I even be able to get the pain meds that I need?

Yes, it is an inconvenience and it is one I tolerate because it’s necessary to obtain the drugs I need. But you have doctors who refuse to prescribe some of these drugs because they are so addictive and pharmacists who won’t fill them because they might get robbed or sued if one of their drug-addled customers OD. And, it certainly seems that such situations combined with stricter laws — no matter how well-meant — could ultimately lead to some people not getting the medicine they need to function and live a productive life. Also, it is impossible to know what the DPS might pull out of their hat. Will the state police tell us when and when not we may get our pain medication? Tell me Nurse Ratched?

This bill will probably pass as legislators like to pass bills whenever restricting drug use is an issue. But as we all know, just because it is a law does not equate with its goodness.

Newt, Newt, Newt. Can you imagine a president named Newt? Now if your name is Newt, I apologize. But the old argument of what if someone disparaged your name doesn’t quite ascend in such instances when your name is Dick.

The real name of former U.S. House speaker is Newton Gingrich, Newt for short. Although his moniker has a giggly ring to it, my opinion is that he, too, should be named Dick.

Gingrich is playing coy about running for president. I suppose that is in case the current pack of jackasses in the GOP who are running find that all of them combined have the same poll numbers as our Republican president. I don’t know if that is really the reason. Perhaps Gingrich just thinks it is cute. It isn’t.

This morning on “Meet the Press,” I could only take about five minutes of Gingrich’s bloviating on immigration and the war on terror. The show’s host, Tim Russert, asked Gingrich if he was running for president in 2008 and was finally able to get an answer that the former speaker was a)thinking about it and 2)would announce a decision in October. Boy, I can hardly wait.

How do I dislike thee, Honorable Pupek (Pupek is Slovenian for Newt, according to Dictionary.com)? Let me count the ways. Actually, I don’t have the time to sit here all day and list reasons why I believe Gingrich shouldn’t run for president or become president or run for any office again.

At least Gingrich isn’t afraid of sounding like a fascist when he talks about restricting the nation’s civil liberties for the greater good of fighting terrorism or whatever.

Today on Russert’s show he said one of the ways to fight illegal immigration is by instituting biometric identity cards. I didn’t quite understand for whom these cards should be required whether those from a foreign country who are in the U.S. or for the naturalized citizens as well. I would be tempted to say that he meant immigrants should be scanned and their info be put on cards to keep track of them. He said this as far back as 2001 while emphasizing the same should not be used for American citizens:

“I would not institute a national ID card because you do get into civil liberties issues.”

As if that would stop Speaker Salamander from having his fellow citizens tracked like sex offenders on parole.

Gingrich has already expressed a willingness to dispose of our First Amendment rights in the name of fighting terrorism.

“Either before we lose a city or, if we are truly stupid, after we lose a city, we will adopt rules of engagement that use every technology we can find to break up their capacity to use the Internet, to break up their capacity to use free speech, and to go after people who want to kill us to stop them from recruiting people.”

Like his ideological brothers and sisters such as Bill O’Reilly, Gingrich also sees us fighting a holy war at home among ourselves due to the danger of so-called “radical secularism.”

“In hostility to American history, the radical secularists insist that religious belief is inherently divisive and that public debate can only proceed on secular terms.”

As if we didn’t have enough problems to tackle such as real wars and various societal problems.

The next president of the U.S. will certainly find his or her hands full with whatever was left out back of the White House by Gee Dubya and his gang. I would hope that the majority of voters in the country would have enough sense to not elect a demagogue like Newt. But then again, look who voters gave a second term to lead the nation. That bunch alone has torn to pieces what is known as our “Bill of Rights.”

If you care in the least about civil liberties, you have to worry just a little.