A few moments ago I stuck my head outside the apartment door just to catch a little of the pre-twilight air. The local squirrel was making its rounds balancing itself cautiously on the wooden fence before leaping into a small tree. I say it’s the local squirrel. I think more than one squirrel call the trees in my neighbor’s yard home.
This one was certainly fat and sassy. My downstairs neighbor had the habit of leaving peanuts in a couple of plastic containers on the fence, so the squirrel may have bulked up on peanuts. The neighbor no longer leaves peanuts for the squirrel as he is in jail on a parole violation. He is the third paroled sex offender who has lived in these apartments since I moved here less than a year ago to violate parole and go back to stir. Jeez, you’d think this is a freakin’ halfway house.
Squirrels are neat to watch though. They take your mind off things like for a little while, like having neighbors who are child molesters. Watching this squirrel, it seemed to me that it was using its tail for balance as well as radar. Squirrel radar. Now there’s a concept. I realized after watching it be a squirrel that I really didn’t know a whole lot about squirrels.
I looked at the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department Web site to read up on the critters. Sure enough the squirrels do use their tails for more than car antenna ornaments and more:
“Squirrels’ long bushy tails are used for a variety of purposes. They can be wrapped around a squirrels face to keep them warm, used as an aid in balancing when they run along tree limbs, or spread and used as a parachute if the squirrel should fall. With a little practice, watching a squirrel’s tail movements gives you a clue to their mood. Quick jerks of the tail signal that they are nervous or upset.”
I suppose I’ll have to start watching my local squirrels more closely. Perhaps I can learn to read their moods by their tails. It sounds like a useful talent. Maybe I could become a squirrel psychologist.
Me to Mr. Squirrel: “Now do humans really drive you nuts?”
Okay, that’s pretty bad. I’m sorry.
I did find squirrels can be dangerous. That is not just because they are rodents and can carry diseases like the plague. No, they are stone cold dog killers.
The above article, along with other tales of squirrels wreaking havoc, can be found on the Squirrel Defamation League Website. I kind of get it that they don’t like squirrels.
But I like squirrels just fine. As long as they mind their own business and don’t go bats**t on me and attack, we will all peacefully coexist. The same goes for my parolee neighbors.