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Welcome to Southeast Texas — Our bananas are armed, by God!

Note from Blogger man: Periodically, I feel I should let people know I have this bad habit of editing this blog once it has been published. And published. And published. Sorry, I am used to editing on paper and it’s just too much damned trouble to hook up the printer!

Hey Mr. Tally Man tally me — uh, an AK-47?

It is always entertaining when something locally that is not a disaster makes international news. Whether that something could have caused a disaster, maybe that is a different matter.

Police here in Beaumont, Texas, said on Feb. 8 “multiple concerned citizens reported that a man standing near the intersection of Highway 105 at the Eastex Freeway Service Road was armed with a rifle.”  Officers arrived just after 10 that morning to find an 18-year-old man “dressed in a banana costume and had an AK-47 rifle slung across his back.  The rifle had a drum magazine attached with at least a 50-round capacity. “

The young man was advertising for the grand opening of a local gun store called Golden Triangle Tactical. One must admit, that the spectacle certainly got the public’s attention from here in Texas to all the way across the pond. “Damned Pommies!” as my old Aussie friends used to say.

Whether the advertising stunt was dramatic irony on behalf of the shop owner, and most probably the Banana Boy, one cannot be certain. You see, the owner of the gun shop had been stopped by officers inside the local Parkdale Mall back in December while carrying what was reported by the media as an “assault rifle” on his back. Derek Poe, the shop owner, told police he was carrying the weapon to his store, which was then located inside the mall. The mall management had stated that guns were prohibited although no signs were posted, that is until after this incident made the news. Poe, decided to find a better location in which to run his shop.

Texas has no laws prohibiting openly packing so-called “long guns,” a fact that many gun advocates have wanted to make known through gatherings and marches with like-minded gun-toting Texans. Some are advocating openly carrying handguns in the state. The list of supporters include Sen. Wendy Davis, who won the Texas Democratic Primary on Tuesday. Davis will face Republican Attorney General Greg Abbott in November.

Beaumont police cited Banana Boy for violating a city ordinance that prohibits soliciting in and alongside roadways.  Poe was cited for disorderly conduct by police for taking a gun to his shop in the mall, so noted by “The Gun Report” on The New York Times website. The initial instance, Poe’s plight, has led to some marches around our area of folks both young and old slinging guns around their shoulders. This resulted in neighboring Port Arthur’s police chief to warn such protesters to stay away. The warning was given during the city’s Mardi Gras celebration last week. Whatever one chooses to make of it, two young women were caught up in a carjacking spree while stopped at a Port Arthur red light on their way to the Mardi Gras festivities Saturday evening.

Some may say that the Port Arthur Police Chief Mark Blanton has flawed reasoning for warning those who openly carry long guns. Blanton is concerned such displays of long guns might hinder people from reporting others toting around rifles or shotguns for reasons instead of exerting their Second Amendment rights. Other law officers worry that the public seeing others carrying long guns may disturb those who carry concealed handguns, and who do not know if the gun-carrying person is a nice fellow or mass murderer. Thus, there might be more shootouts at the O-K Corral, so to speak. All of such may seem reactionary police reasoning. But, now wait a minute.

Any crime reporting in Port Arthur would be anecdotal on my part. It sure seems a lot takes place listening to or reading local media. This especially since the town has hit the rocks economically over the past years, despite a boom in construction at local refineries and petrochemical plants. It seems like crime is rampant in Port Arthur. And most is so-called “Black on Black” crime. That is not unusual in the U.S., nor in Port Arthur. Unfortunately this isn’t rare since the town has an African-American population of 40 percent and 36 percent white, followed by Hispanics, Asians and other ethnicities.

The point is, those folks who drive the main highways through “the PA,” will likely see black people. And I just wonder what these gun advocates, mostly white, would feel seeing wave after wave of assault-rifle toting young black kids? Oh well, “we’ll just even out things,” some of the white gun-carrying folks might say. It doesn’t matter though. The point is, a bunch of gunfire in the streets is hardly a positive Chamber of Commerce-Convention and Visitor’s Bureau welcome.

Those who know me know that I am pro gun — to the point I like shooting them and I believe they have a place in our personal safety and culture. The encouragement of violence, by comparison, not so much. I like the fact we can carry long guns in our vehicles and handguns as well. I’ve often thought that perhaps openly carrying handguns would be safer than concealed carry. I am not so sure now. I do not like the vision of masses carrying long guns in our streets unless they are military folks or cops who are marching during a Veterans Day parade. And what will the (paying) neighbors say? A bunch of heavily armed people openly carrying weapons might be exciting for some silly Eurotrash who think they’ve landed into a Wild West show. But me? I prefer living in the not-so-wild, uh, West.

And, I think fruit wearing assault rifles around their shoulders and marching down the highways are just damned silly!

 

 

 

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And when all else fails, talk turns to Texas

Seems Texas is in the political news today. Nothing new. It shouldn’t be. I mean why should it, given this is the second largest state in population and the second largest in area? It’s two (smack) two (smack) two number two states in one.

Sr. Comadreja, a.k.a Sen. Ted Cruz, the Canadian-Cuban who represents the two-for-two state in the upper house was visiting here in Beaumont yesterday at the Spindletop-Gladys City Boomtown Museum. The symbolism is not lost because the museum is only a short-short away from the gusher that started the modern petroleum industry. So, Cruz represents the “new” Tea Party face of the Republican party, but doesn’t want to shy away from that good ol’ awl money. Dana Bash of CNN was interviewing Cruz at the Boomtown, asking him about all kinds of insignificant matters. Such as Ted Nugent campaigning for Greg Abbott, Texas attorney general and candidate for the Republican nomination for governor.

Nugent said some things which are really not very meaningful when it comes to anything. Unless, perhaps you interpret ol patriotic, draft-dodging Teddy’s words as racist. But the media, mostly the cable news networks, have to pounce on these things. He called President Obama a “subhuman mongrel” and some other things which weren’t nice. When Abbott was questioned about the aging rock singer’s remarks, the GOP goober-natorial candidate for governor ran away from the media with both hands over his ears, screaming: “Nonononononon!!” All of that is pretty difficult since Abbott’s weird encounter, some years back, when a tree fell on him as he was jogging. I mean that is what insurance companies mean when they say: ” … act of God … ” That didn’t stop lawyer Abbott for suing the pants and just about everything else off the people “responsible.” Yes indeed, what a good Republican-stop-lawsuit-abuse fellow. As a matter of fact, Abbott continued to sue folks upon taking oath as Texas AG, especially suing the U.S. of A.

Perhaps for good measure, or Good Hair, Wolf Blitzer had old Good Hair himself on his program this afternoon. Gov. Rick Perry was hemmin’ and hawin’ about, whom else? Ted Nugent.

 “He shouldn’t have said that about the president, said Perry. “But we should be focused on what’s really important here.”

Whatever that might be.

 “Ted has said some pretty outrageous things … ” I do have a problem with somebody calling the president a mongrel.”

“That was a ‘subhuman mongrel!’ ” Wolf reiterated.

Yeah, well. A few free minutes of watching the “news” after an exhausting day all shot to hell by the “subhuman” elite of Texas politics.

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Local university fires coach with famous name, maybe more

Basketball, has not been berry berry good to me. I never played, at least in an organized fashion. I was the varsity team’s equipment manager as a high school freshman. That was prior to my career throughout high school as a sports writer. Then pick up games, the most famous happening at the end of my first week at rookie school as a firefighter. A guy named Blaine threw me a hard pass and, snap, went my left pinkie. About two years later I broke the other pinkie playing another pickup game. From then on, nothing stronger than H-O-R-S-E.

Basketball has not been berry berry good to our local university either. Fans at Lamar University, a low-end Division I NCAA school in Beaumont, Texas, thought they’d been set afire two years ago when the school hired Pat Knight as mens basketball coach. Yes, as in that Knight. In the end, Lamar basketball had not been so beery berry good to Pat Knight.

The junior Knight led his first Lamar Cardinals team to the 2012 NCAA Tournament. The team crapped out in the first round. But it was the first Cardinal team to go to the big show in 20 years. It did take some Bobby Knight-like bluster. His lengthy rant after his team was verbally scorched by my old alma mater, Stephen F. Austin, went viral on You Tube.

 “I mean these kids are stealing money by being on a scholarship … “ Pat Knight said at one point in the nearly nine-minute harangue.

That massive tongue-lashing seemed to turn the team around, as they won the conference title and headed to the NCAA tourney. But since then. Nothing. Or about as close as you can get. Last season, Lamar went 3-28 overall. This year was 3-22, as for the Knight era, which ended last night. He was fired with two years remaining on his contract.

It seemed as if a story about an upcoming Lamar- University of New Orleans match-up Thursday was psychic. A Friday Times-Picayune story was headlined: “Lamar University Coach Pat Knight facing heat playing UNO Thursday.” Of course, Knight no longer faces heat.

My not being a big basketball fan, perhaps, expands the patience I have for folks. Especially those people who I find very entertaining. The university just brought back football and one would expect a team would need a bit of time to stack those building blocks together. The football Cardinals haven’t swept up its share of winning either. I guess it is because I have met Lamar football coach Ray Woodard and found him to be a genuinely nice guy is where I tune out calls by those who expect instant wins to fire him. I had plenty of patience for Pat Knight, though I don’t personally know him. Of course, Knight has also perhaps expected the trapdoor, even though he didn’t say so out loud.

In a very non-basketball way, Pat Knight has been good for Lamar and good for college hoops. As the son of one of the top three winningest college coaches and himself a player on an NCAA Championship team, Knight has seen how the glory of the game makes some players feel they are bigger than the game itself. For some reason, some chumps who can do not much more than shoot hoops think the world should be made over in their likeness. Knight, Pat and Bob, seem to think young men should be cut down a notch. Perhaps it is to remind the players that they should always be shooting up toward the hoops rather than down at them and at the rest of the world.

Or maybe they’re just big bullies on an ego trip. Who the hell knows?

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The Trans-Louisiana express: Unearthing friendliness in the Pelican State

Wednesday saw me take what might be called a “whirlwind trip” to Louisiana. I had to do safety inspections in Lafayette and Alexandria, then drive back home to Beaumont in the same day. It has been awhile since I covered that much ground. My best guess is that I drove about 300 miles. I’ve not had time to study the odometer readings I had to write down for my work vehicle.

The sun was rising above all the huge petrochemical pipe towers when I neared Lake Charles. A perfectly clear morning. It was even more a spectacular sight when summiting the Interstate 10 bridge over the Calcasieu River.

It was on that same trek to Lafayette that I found myself being serenaded by the fiddles and accordion as well as the soulful sounds of Cajun French lyrics. Although I live in what is called “Cajun Texas” this area I found myself in is the real Boudreaux. The station, KBON 101.1 FM in Eunice, La., is a channel I have listened to many times on the internet and somehow just forgot about it.

The two-step Cajun music, as well as a little Clifton Chenier zydeco thrown in, recalled my younger days when I would drive from my Navy base in Gulfport, Miss., maybe once a month or every couple of months to my Texas hometown near Louisiana border. Rather than from this side of Lafayette, I would pick up a station after traveling through Baton Rouge and the long bridges on I-10 of the Atchafalya Basin. I don’t know if it was the same station or call letters. Back then I only had an AM radio in my car. Not only would I heard the music of Acadien but some of the lesser-known songs of “hippy” music, the kind of B-sides or album cuts you hear when someone puts the record on, but aren’t the more popular tunes. Either way: “Looka!” I done found myself in the land of Ca-juns!

I made my first trip to downtown Alexandria. It was pretty underwhelming from the area in which I saw it. It’s not as bleak as our county neighbor Port Ar-ture (Port Arthur, Texas), but at least from the view presented from I-49 Alexandria definitely lacked curb appeal.

The trip home was a bit confusing to say the least. I intended to take U.S. Hwy. 165, which would bring me back to I-10 in Iowa (La.) and not a long trip from Iowa back to Lake Charles and the Texas line. But I didn’t see any signs, for some reason, for Hwy. 165. I did see ones for U.S. 167, so that was the road I took. I eventually came to this nice-sized eatery and grocery store that had the look of the famous Buc-ee’s with the cleanest restrooms in Texas. Or so they say. I figured, why not stop, especially since the name of the place is “Y-Not Stop.”

This place was more like Buc-ees than I had imagined. It even had clean restrooms and a couple of terminals in the restaurant from which you could place your order, extract a ticket and sit down. They would call your name and you could pay or you could pay and they would still call your name. That’s not to say it was a knock-off of Buc-ee’s. It just had some similarities.

While waiting I looked at the map function on both smart phones I had with me — a Blackberry from work and an iPhone that is my personal cell — for a road to take me home. My preference was finding Hwy. 165. Both phones proved useless, mainly because the hair-trigger screens are a nightmare for a person with tremors in his hand.

I finally resorted to the old-fashioned way of navigation. I asked for directions.

First I asked a guy sitting across from me. He wasn’t from the area but he did his best. By then I had received a catfish sandwich with a fried filet halved and placed on a wheat bun with the dressings I ordered. I knew I shouldn’t but I also ordered their onion rings. Oh my, they were lightly crusted with a light-brown look and it felt like eating, well, a ring of onion, only one with a light crust of corn meal, flour and whatever secret seasoning that was concocted for this delight.

Before finishing, this big ol,’ good ol’ boy came walking undoubtedly on his way out.

“You need directions to Highway 167? I grew up around here.”

I told him I did. He told me to go down “this road take a right, go over the bridge, you’ll cross under I-49 and you’ll come to  167 in Woodworth.”

Woodworth rang a bell. I had asked directions of the people I met in both Alex and Lafayette. They told me about Woodworth and told me to watch my speed because the place was a speed trap.

“And,” said the good ol’ boy, “Watch your speed when you come to Woodworth.”

I was doubtful about the directions because it put me on a narrow, paved road. The road crossed a wood bridge and it snaked around what looked like a river or bayou that mirrors the larger Red River nearby. This was a reddish-clay type water body and that same redness coated leaves lying about the previously flooded areas. It reminded me of the area around Nacogdoches, TX, where I spent many younger and semi-younger days. Eventually, I crossed under I-49 and came to the town of Woodworth. I saw the speed limit of 35 mph, so I set my cruise control to 30. I finally got out on Hwy. 165, still going 30 for quiet a ways. Good thing, because I saw a couple of police cars had someone pulled over. After awhile I came through the casino town of Kinder, home to the Coushatta Indian casino, then knew I had only an hour or so before getting home.

It was quite an interesting day, despite having a continued bout with a bum knee. I have no idea what’s wrong with it. I am waiting to hear from a specialist about an appointment. I thought about how Texas had the motto: “Friendship.” It was apparently from the days the Caddo roamed the then-virgin pine forests of East Texas. I always liked to think Texas had the friendliest people in the country. It might not seem so these days with our opportunistic Gov. Good Hair, folks like the jackass freshman Republican U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz and the assortment of nuts that make up the Tea Party arm of the GOP in the Texas and U.S. legislatures.

But I had to say, for today at least, our neighbors to the east can be pretty worthy of that “friendship” motto. Thanks to my Louisiana friends.