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Monkeying around with iPods: Will it lead to gambling in Texas?

Let’s see. You have Super Bowl XLVII being played at the Mercedes-Benz Superbowl. That grand old venue has moved on up from its days as the Louisiana Superdome, back when I saw the very first concert there featuring the Allman Brothers.

Oh lawd, somebody done bought a Mercedes-Benz! Then you got the Mardi Gras going on, Fat Tuesday itself a week from Tuesday coming. So you for sure got some crazy happening.

Then, of course, you got the “Brother Bowl.” Two brothers named Harbaugh happen to be coaching against each other. The only thing that could be more perfect for the media would be two brothers coaching against each other and two brothers as QB facing each other. Kind of like say, the hometown New Aw’lens Manning boys. Wouldn’t that be something! But the Mannings aren’t playing — except probably in one of those $4 million tv spots — so that means only one thing that could be better. Yes suh! Monkeys!

And leave it to the folks on the Island, I’m talking Galveston Island, to produce some monkeys to go prognosticate the Super Bowl winners.

Three saki monkeys with iPads have picked the San Francisco 49ers to win the Super Bowl over the Baltimore Ravens. Glory be!

 “Two of the monkeys selected made their selections by painting on the 49ers logo. The third showed his feelings on the game by placing unhappy faces on the Ravens logo,” said a press release from Moody Gardens, where the sakis and other wild things live in a 10-story glass pyramid. Those island folks can be plenty crazy, you know.
The Rainforest Pyramid is a 10-story glass structure that is home to more than 1,000 species of plants and animals, the Moody Gardens release from PR Newswire said. After a $25 million enhancement in 2011, visitors are able to experience more rainforest life from around the world, including Africa, Asia and the Americas. Many of the animals within the pyramid are free-roaming, like the saki monkeys and cotton-top tamarinds.
 
Cotton-top tamarinds? Why I think I saw some of those island sugars dressed in cotton-top tamarinds. Or maybe not. The PR folks for Moody Gardens say the iPads those little monkeys are using is part of an “enrichment program.” Enrichment? Like maybe gambling? Galveston used to be known for that way back when the island was wide open with famous places like the Balinese.
If some folks have their way and their wishes come true with casino gambling, Galveston could become something in between New Orleans and Atlantic City. The Texas Lege is in session as we speak but casino gambling will be a hard sell for Texas. Years ago, all the hyper-religious groups kept such establishments away. But now the religious have a friend in that fight. The friend is big gambling which is found in every state bordering The Lone Star State.
We’ll see what happens. But you have to watch them monkeys. They’re sneaky little devils. First thing it’s football and the next thing all of a sudden its “Seven come 11.”  You know all that talk about evolution and stuff.
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Top 10 bills to follow in the 2013 Texas Lege reduced by 7

Austin television station KXAN has an interesting Top 10 list of proposed bills to follow in the 2013 Texas legislative session. Some are downright playing-to-the-right-wing-base ignorant. Here are my top five from that list:

1. Drug testing for welfare — There will be no epidemic of poor folks using drugs by the time this bill, filed by GOP Sen. Jane Nelson of Flower Mound, passes than there is now. It’s a “feel-good” elixir for the right wing. It’s demagoguery plain and simple.

2. Ten Commandments in Class — Republican Rep. Dan Flynn of Van wants copies of the Ten Commandments placed in “prominent” places in the classroom. I’ve got nothing against the Ten Commandments, but they violate laws separating church and state. This will wind up in court(s) and cost the taxpayers untold dollars while losing the case.

3. TSA Anti-groping — It could only be a guess but I bet when the Twin Towers et. al. came down on 9/11 probably some of those hollering the loudest for the federal government to stop such a thing from happening were some of our friends on the right. And on the left. We have security now in airports and many think they are too important to be inconvenienced by precautions which often leads to them getting groped in the first place. Yes, it might be random. So what? You don’t have to fly. GOP Rep. David Simpson of Longview tried to pass this last session and Gov. Good Hair had it brought up in Special Session. Jeez, prohibit TSA groping? Can we also prohibit Fox News?

Well, I only got to three that were out-of-the-Solar-System-Stupid. That doesn’t mean the remainder are all winners, or losers for that matter.

–Open Carry — Republican Rep. George Lavender of Texarkana may file a bill similar to one he pushed last time which would allow those holding licenses to carry a concealed handgun to optionally carry the weapon in the open. I’ve often thought that this made more sense than allowing concealed carry only. At least if someone is openly carrying a gun one can see it and do all that is possible to either ignore that person or make sure that you have something twice that person’s firepower. No seriously, I don’t know but the proposal seems to have some good points as well as bad ones. I know a lot of folks who would like guns outlawed. I can see how that would be a good thing in a different world. We are unfortunately stuck with the world we have.

— Texting while driving. The GOP former House Speaker Tom Craddick of Midland is pushing this bill, which Good Hair vetoed, again. It needs to be not only passed, but signed by our idiot governor.

–Tuition freeze. Dan Branch, the Republican House member from Dallas wants college tuition in state institutions frozen for students for four years from the time they enter school. UT Austin currently freezes tuition for two years. This is to encourage finishing in four years. I think this is a good idea, perhaps with a fifth year available in emergency situations.

–SJR 6 — Casino and slot gambling. Sen. Rodney Ellis, D-Houston, and others want a constitutional amendment to let voters decide whether a small number of casinos should be allowed in Texas. Limited numbers of slot and video gambling machines at horse tracks would be allowed as would gambling at the state’s Indian reservations. I have no moral reservations about this, pardon the pun. I wonder if it can pass what with surrounding states and the large gambling interests behind those states.

–The rest — I have no opinion on the other bills listed. You can read them your own-self.

 

 

 

 

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Lege will confront casino gambling in Texas again in 2013

Will Texas see casinos anytime soon?

Ten years ago I would have said that kind of talk is crazy. But during a time when more and more money is needed for the state to piss away, well, let’s just say desperate times call for desperate measures.

Houston Democrat Rodney Ellis has authored Senate Joint Resolution 6, which would propose a constitutional amendment to allow casino gambling and slot machines by a limited number of licensed operators and Indian tribes. Video lottery would also be authorized at licensed horse and dog tracks as well as on Indian reservations.

The law would establish a Texas Gaming Commission to oversee the gambling. Eight horse and dog tracks would be allowed a certain number of slot machines. Six licensed “casino-anchored destination attraction development projects” would be authorized in different Texas urban areas. Hmm, sounds like Disney World meets the one-arm bandit! Two Gulf of Mexico island-based casinos could likewise operate on Galveston and Padre Island.

I have as of yet not found a specific revenue estimate all of this might bring although funds generated from such a proposal would specifically help provide property tax relief and money for higher education.

This is not, trying to be trite, the first rodeo for Texas when it comes to attempts at establishing casino gambling. I have covered efforts in both Texas at allowing parimutuel horse racing and in establishing slots at race tracks in Louisiana. I can tell you that trying to establish gaming of any kind in both states is an uphill battle. Yes, some of the opposition is based on moral and religious concerns. But the “do-gooders” aren’t those who sponsor gambling measures should worry about. It’s those in gambling who are the biggest foes.

I remember writing about the first attempt in the mid-1990s to add slot machines to the Delta Downs race track in Vinton, La. Louisiana had and still has limited casino gambling and one of the hotspots was and is Lake Charles, about 30 miles west of the Texas border off Interstate 10. Vinton is closer to Texas than that. Delta Downs is slightly more than two miles from the border, not far off of I-10. Lake Charles has long attracted customers from the Houston area and beyond, so one may only imagine how adding slots just across the Sabine River from Texas might cut into the gambling pie of the multiple Lake Charles-area spots.

The first attempt failed. But try try again and now you have Delta Downs Racetrack Casino. There are slots, off-track betting and horse racing in season. Supply and demand won.

Established casinos in Lake Charles fought like hell to keep casinos from Delta Downs. We’re talking the biggest of the bigs at the time. I think LC now has even more gambling spots after rebuilding from two hurricanes. Texas is surrounded by gambling either in commercial or Indian casinos. One can imagine that the casinos in Bossier City, Lake Charles, and those on the Oklahoma and New Mexico reservations will all have their lobbyists in Austin this spring.

It is a little too early to worry about casino gambling in Texas at this point though. Sen. Ellis only calls for a constitutional amendment. If the gambling interests from out-of-state do not take down SJR 6, then it will be up to Texas voters how such an amendment will go. If I were a betting man, I would not take a bet on whether a law allowing casinos in Texas would pass.

Only time will tell whether the special interests from the gambling industry push lawmakers away from the measure and, if passed, if Texans vote the amendment in come November a year from now. Then, it will likely end up a local-option issue. There is a lot of voting ahead before we see a Harrah’s in the Lone Star State.