Who needs Mariah when you got the Versatones?


Eddie Blazonczyk’s Versatones are certainly the coolest-looking of all the Grammy polka nominees.

Lost amid all the hoopla of Mariah Carey’s eight Grammy nomination were the nominations for the Best Polka Album (Vocal or Instrumental.)

• Under The Influence
Eddie Blazonczyk’s Versatones
[Bel Aire Records]

• Time Out For Polkas And Waltzes
Walter Ostanek And Ron Sluga
[Sunshine Diversified Ent.]

• Polka Pizzazz
Del Sinchak Band
[Peppermint Records]

• Solecktions
Kevin Solecki
[Peppermint Records]

• Shake, Rattle And Polka!
Jimmy Sturr And His Orchestra
[Rounder]

Of course, my favorite nuclear polka band Brave Combo wasn’t nominated this year. Maybe next year.

Always a bride never a fiancee


White House officials have denied Barbara Bush is engaged after she was seen wearing a ring on the third finger of her left hand. Former President George Herbert Walker Bush said he was relieved to hear that.

Spell check? We don't need no stinking spell check


Texas Dem hopeful David Van Os and Fraken Al.
And so I wound up looking at David Van Os’ Web site and found this picture of him when he was on Al Franken’s radio show. The problem was the caption says David Van Os with “Al Fraken.” Well, I don’t suppose you need to spell correctly to be the Texas attorney general which is the office being sought by Os or Van Os or Os Van David, whatever he is calling himself these days.

Jesus! Wear your flak jacket


Soldiers in the war on Christmas prepare to blow up Joseph, Mary and the baby Jesus.
Hey, Christmas is in danger! That’s right. The ACLU and the Democrats and everyone who doesn’t watch Fox News is trying to take Christmas away from God fearing Amerh-i-cans.

The religious right supposedly is in danger from the evil anti-Christmas forces. At least that is the case if you listen to the horse shit from people like Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity. Now even CBS News is starting to report on the War on Christmas. Seems like George W. didn’t kiss the religious right ass quite enough when he sent out “holiday” cards. Oops! There must be one of those atheists on his staff. Never mind that he had a verse from Psalms right above the greeting.

Hey you ignorant asses! There is no war on Christmas. All right? There are other religions in this country other than Christians. But the right wing Christians don’t seem to be very Christian-like in accepting it. Perhaps it is like Mark Twain said: “If Christ were here now, there is one thing he would not be — a Christian.” Maybe not, but it seems like a bunch of egomaniacs who would just as soon be liberals if it advanced their careers such as O’Reilly are just manufacturing this so-called “war” on Christmas. I don’t know a whole hell of a lot of Jewish people objecting to Christmas in the U.S. Ditto with Muslims or even Wiccans.

I think if you are seriously worried about Christmas being outlawed, then you need to stop watching or listening to right-wing propaganda. There is just a whole lot of crap being stirred up for political gain. Frankly, I’m more worried about the government outlawing “National Talk Like a Pirate Day.” Arrrggghhh matie! When they outlaw talking like a pirate only pirates will talk like a pirate!

The best red beans ever


Visualize swirled red beans. Or maybe not.

Among the fond memories I have of 2 1/2 years stationed in Gulfport, Miss., is red beans and rice.

Even though I grew up practically in Cajun country I never really came to appreciate wonderfully spicy red beans and rice until my Navy days in Gulfport during the middle 1970s. I remember Sundays you could go to many of the bars in town and could partake of free red beans and rice to accompany your beer. Not among those bars was Jim’s Lounge and Postman’s, down the street from Jim’s, where most of my Seabee friends and I hung out. I don’t know why they didn’t have free red beans and rice. Maybe because Jim, who owned both bars, was too cheap. Nonetheless, my friend Betti tended bar at Jim’s and she would invite us over to her place for what I believed was the best red beans ever.

Years after leaving Gulfport I tried to approximate the red beans I had back in my days on the Mississippi Gulf Coast. I always fell short. That is, until today. I don’t know what I did right. Maybe it was the Cajun seasoning. Perhaps the ham hock or the garlic or maybe I just had good kitchen karma today. But these beans will make you slap your granny, for sure.

I did some doctoring on the photo because my beans don’t photograph well. Or maybe I don’t photograph them well. But take my word for it, after I cook some rice I will be entering culinary nirvana for awhile. I won’t say these beans are as good as Betti’s but they are the best ever that I’ve cooked. Ahhhh. Food is good.