Going to Lafayette or parts east? Don’t let the Beaumont traffic tie you up.

Expect a tie-up on Interstate-10 nearing the Neches River bridge about 80 miles east of Houston. You see, this is actually a normal condition for those of us who live in and around Beaumont. The Neches River bridge — actually named the Purple Heart Memorial Bridge but shoulda been named the George Jones Bridge — is under renovation until who knows when. Right now it is the eastbound lane getting backed up but eventually the westbound lane will have its share. Although, the westbound side will probably get stacked on the Orange County side. Serves them right for failing to vote for George Jones.

At this moment, the eastbound lane on I-10 in Beaumont is backed up some six miles or so from the bridge. That is right before you get to the Washington Boulevard overpass. So if you are reading this while driving. STOP!!! That’s a very stupid thing to do.

A pretty good rule of thumb during construction on the EB side of the bridge is to avoid it at all costs during rush hours. Yes, we get those too. I would not even attempt to cross the bridge on Friday afternoon. During the rest of the week, you should check out this map. It gives a pretty good representation of the live traffic.

But what if you are going to gamble at Delta Downs or the Lake Charles boats? Or perhaps you are going down to Lafayette to do the Cajun twist. Perhaps you might just decide to visit a friend in New Alluns. He be in Harvey and you can find him easy because he stays by his Moms like always, dat is, if he ain’t out chootin’ some bones or maybe even some alleygator. That might not be how the New Alluns people speak, but this here blog it ain’t about etymology nor is about words. And it sho’ nuff ain’t about no double negative. Right on?

That reminds me, I was talking to this creole dude from Thibodaux or some place like that and after every sentence he be saying “right on,” right on? Man, this cat was talking about some bar fights and people bringing knives to gunfights and allus kinda s**t! Right on? Right on.
That also remind me. One of my favorite bayou boogie song was a tune called “Cajun Twist.” I hadn’t heard it in a long time but heard that dude who say “choot it” on the alligator show “Swamp People.” I think his name is Troy. He was half singing and half humming a verse while he was doing something or other. And trut’ be tole, he weren’t doing much to either half on that song. Which, I suppose is just as good as sticking to the original lyrics when you do have the vocal blessings.

So, I have given you Randy and the Rockets, doing that old Cajun Twist. And I will give you some alternate routes to Louisiana while I am at it.

There are a couple of ways to get to Louisiana without having to go through Beaumont while this $59 million bridge renovation is under way. And it’s easy to find those ways. All you need is this magical device. It’s called a map.

Everyone needs to learn how to use a map.  Have you a jumbo kinda time whether you be headed to Louisiana or Texas-ana. Have fun this weekend. Stay safe.