Show me a serial bank robber these days and I will likely find you some strange nickname made up for that person or persons.
I don’t know whether these names come from the FBI agent who serves as media liaison in the larger division offices or whether the bureau has a computer that generates monikers in the way random generators do on some Web sites. Needless to say, some of these which I found today while looking through the FBI’s Houston Division press releases were amusing.
The prize goes to the “Sweatin’ to the Oldies Bandit.”
Actually, the alleged bank robber reminds me more of an overweight and unmasked Klaatu
“Klaatu barada nikto”
from “The Day the Earth Stood Still” than some Richard Simmons devotee. Hi-ho Silver (above) robbed two Houston banks in late August within less than an hour’s time. No idle hands here.
FBI agents are as well on the look for another busy bank robber, this one dubbed “The Grandma Bandit.” Now I would be willing to bet this “grandma” would have appreciated a more flattering nickname.
“You could use some castor oil and I could use all your money”
On Friday Granny allegedly robbed two banks — both Compass Banks — in a time span of about an hour. What’s with these fast robberies? I guess that like a rolling stone, these bandits don’t care to gather any moss, or coppers.
Finally, I think the FBI were scraping the bottom of the barrel coming up with this name, The Déjà Vu Bandit.
- “This is all too familiar”
He was so named because he robbed the same bank, on the same street, while wearing the same shirt, although the robberies were on different days. Well, what can you say? All good bandits have to have their lucky “bank robbing shirt.” And as far as robbing the same company’s banks on the same street, this alleged crook is just abiding by the well-worn principle of “sticking with what they know.”
Weird.