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Take your laughs outside the dream, please

One of the times I woke up during my slumber early this morning was when I laughed myself awake.

It isn’t often that I awake laughing. As a matter of fact, it maybe has happened only once before if that.

"Dude, that song was by my band, Gone to the Dogs." Photo by jdurham. Courtesy of Morguefile.com
"Dude, that song was by my band, Gone to the Dogs." Photo by jdurham. Courtesy of Morguefile.com

This was a very odd dream, as dreams sometime are. It involved my entire family — my mother and father who have both been dead for about 25 years and my four older brothers. It appeared that we were kids then but were old enough to know that we were to respect older people and not make fun of people with infirmities. We were trying hard to be good, which was kind of odd in itself for our bunch.

I don’t remember all the details of the dream, but it involved my dad talking to this old man who was having difficulty walking. We were all in a hurry to go somewhere and my father was about to tell the man that he would come visit him sometime in the future.

Alas, as my father opened his mouth out came this song that sounded like a recording of some rock song that said something about enjoying the visit last night. Two of my brothers were doing all they could to contain themselves and I, who in the dream was the more principled one of the group (hey, remember, this is a dream), burst out laughing in reality.

Apparently, I couldn’t laugh in my dream so I had to go outside of it to let ‘er rip. Maybe we were in a “No Laughing Zone.”

Now isn’t that a hell of thing?

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Enjoy Letterman blackmail story while you can

Like probably millions of other busybodies I am, at the moment, caught up in the whole David Letterman scandal. My interest is that it is a compelling story involving a high-dollar blackmail plot against a very unique entertainer whom I happen to like.

Also grabbing my attention is the fact that the guy who allegedly tried to extort $2 million out of Letterman over the star having sex with co-workers, Robert Haldeman, is himself an Emmy-winning television producer. Information from an arrest warrant for the man also says that the suspect lived at one time with one of the women with whom Letterman was having an affair. That woman, Stephanie Birkitt, has been seen many times on “Late Night With David Letterman.” Birkitt — who hosted Winter Olympic coverage on the show in 2002 and 2006,  is not accused of any crimes. It appears just to be a pawn in the alleged blackmail.

I have no feelings one way or the other about any who are involved in this saga, at least from the standpoint of their involvement or non-involvement. I think Letterman was smart to get out in front of this. I always thought Birkitt was cute and funny cast as a faux airhead. I actually thought she would one day go somewhere in show business.

The problem with this type of story is we will get sick of it because it will be cussed and discussed ad nauseum as the media has a propensity for dead horse beating. The reason is that the media, in most cases correctly, assumes the public always wants more of a great story especially one involving celebrities. Another factor is that the media is lazy. It is easier to continue milking a story for every last drop than crawling around out in the trenches looking for news.

So I guess I will enjoy the story until it starts getting on my nerves. When it comes to news, one must know when to say when.

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O bitch-slaps Beck and Fox once again

  For quite awhile now the loonies of right-wing punditry land have had a pretty free hand in telling lies on their opponents with little consequence. But no less than the president of the United States is now challenging the veracity of Glenn Beck and Fox News and friends.

 The White House responded Wednesday on its blog to charges Beck and others have made regarding Obama’s attempts to gain an Olympic bid for Chicago. White House blogger Jessie Lee wrote on a post titled “Reality Check: Trying to Turn a Point of Pride Into a Moment of Shame” that the Olympics were once a point of pride and unity for the country but …

 ” … once again Fox News’ Glenn Beck program has shown that nothing is worthy of respect if it can be used as part of a partisan attack to boost ratings.”

 In the words of some long forgotten barfly who sat in the bar stool next to me in Jim’s Lounge back during my Navy days in Gulfport, Miss.: “You got that right!”

 Obama’s folks are no longer playing nice and letting completely absurd untruths to slide by. The White House Blog post noted:

  “RHETORIC:    BECK SAID VANCOUVER LOST $1 BILLION WHEN IT “HAD THE OLYMPICS.”   Glenn Beck said, “Vancouver lost, how much was it? they lost a billion dollars when they had the Olympics.”  [Transcript, Glenn Beck Show, 9/29/09]

 “REALITY:   VANCOUVER’S OLYMPICS WILL NOT TAKE PLACE UNTIL 2010.   Vancouver will host the 2010 Olympic and Paralympic Games from February 12 – 28, 2010 and March 12-21, 2010, respectively. [Vancouver2010.com, accessed 9/29/09]”

 You can read the rest for yourself and see how the Obama administration has a whole new ballgame under way in dealing with even its most powerful critics.

 Obama has snubbed Fox more than once lately and his avoidance has been nothing if not matter-of-fact.

 More thoughtful pundits say Obama is making a mistake not talking to the large audience watching Fox News. But the fact is, his electoral base is not the typical Glenn Beck watcher. Plus, Fox has become increasingly even in its overall news coverage — forget talk shows like Beck, O’Reilly and Hannity — more biased toward the right. The ads Fox took out falsely claiming other news outlets avoided covering the events of the recent Tea Partyista’s march on Washington are just some of the more blatant examples of the cable channel heading toward a dominant role as a right-wing propaganda tool.

 I am happy for this boldness towards Fox and demagogues such as Beck. Their lies do nothing but obscure information the people need about their government. Likewise, it becomes more difficult to govern and to be governed.

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Is more less in the school hours debate?

 President Obama has likely added to the list of those who aren’t very happy with him. This time it is the small fry.

 Obama wants kids to spend more time in the classroom. This includes longer school days and opening on weekends to give kids a safe place to go. The idea is that U.S. students are behind those in other countries because of the fewer hours American kids spend in class.

 Arne Duncan, Obama’s education secretary, pointed out that today’s educational system is based on an agrarian society and that not many kids are working the fields. While some studies have shown that more hours is conducive to better learning in certain subjects, adding hours — and how they are added — is something that is wrapped in multiple social and economic issues.

 It’s true not a lot of families can be found out working the fields these days. Likewise, not a lot of couples raise a slew of kids just because the extra help is needed in the fields.

 But some families do work the fields both those that are desperate for money and the family farmers who would like to pass their way of life and assets to their offspring.

 Then one must consider family vacations — for those that take them. I can’t recall having ever taken one as a kid unless you consider loading the family up in a pickup one Sunday and visiting Houston. I don’t mention that with resentment because it is simply something I didn’t dwell on as a kid, so I see no reason to do so now. That doesn’t mean my summers were void of fun.

 The point is that no one family is the same and the time schools now give more for family and student recreation is used in a host of different ways.

 Speaking of recreation, I wonder how Disneyworld and Six Flags would make out should kids have shortened vacations? And what about day care businesses if schools days were lengthened? The parents might come out better financially not having to shell out a lot of bucks for day care. Who knows?

 This is not the first time such a subject has surfaced. I remember it being talked about more than 40 years ago when I was a kid. I wasn’t the idea’s biggest fan back then. The idea has also been renewed several times in my more recent years.

 Personally, I like the structure of classes and school calendar one finds in colleges and universities. I refer to taking classes at different times of the day with class hours varying in length and days, and having the ability to either take or not take a vacation, or take one-half of the summer off. I am sure that would require way too many kinks to work out.

 But implementing the types of changes Obama is talking about would also require quite a bit of upheaval. The social and economic ramification are such that it seems the only way it could be effective would be making such changes on a national basis. And Americans are pretty protective when it comes to local control in school matters.

 While there is merit in more hours of school there similarly can be great value in time off. Spending time  with one’s family or just chillin’ and recharging the batteries or even playing with your imaginary friends thus developing a better sense of imagination can all be worthwhile. It just depends on how it all is being done and ensuring parents are ensuring the kids are responsibly overseen.

 The president has got a lot on his plate. This is one area he should leave for the local schools.

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Facebook poll a feloniously stupid action

 One has to wonder about the intellectual acuity of societal members who engage in totally over-the-edge Internet discourse for all the world to see.

 I speak of the recent flap over a poll placed by a third party on Facebook that asked if the President of the United States should be killed. That such a horrendous post would be put up by some dips**t for millions of readers is stupid beyond imagination on more than one level. Some 700 responses were received before the offending poll was removed by Facebook. Left out in all the stories I have read were the numbers voting in the affirmative. We thus have little knowledge whether the omission was a gesture of good taste or something to do with the ongoing investigation of the incident by the Secret Service. It would be kind of instructive to know.

 Given that a person or persons are stupid enough to post something so obscene makes me think there are people who are as equally moronic that they would answer online in favor of the question. 

 Now I don’t know if all Facebook polls are created equally but I see quite a few voted on by my Facebook friends that are exhibited in plain view on their sites. But even if the poll allowed for some smidgen of anonymity, do you think that maybe authorities like the Secret Service might just find a way to crack that secrecy via warrants and various legal niceties?

 It doesn’t matter if you were joking — and if you were joking I can’t imagine anyone with the sense of humor to laugh at such barbarity — if you were stupid enough to vote on that poll and answered something other than “no” it seems like you should be due a visit by some scary looking dudes wearing suits and dark glasses. And that is the way it should be.

 Some actions do not rise to the level of felonious stupidity. I say posting this poll on Facebook, and voting at all, but at the very least voting “yes” or “yes if he cuts my health care” is grievously stupid.