Eight Feet Deep

Greet­ings and cal­i­bra­tions on what is a thunder-filled, rainy, Fri­day after­noon in South­east Texas. It’s been a stress­ful week so I thought I’d just throw a few odds and ends out there and see if they stick to anything.

We’re so glad that’s cleared up

After all these years we finally learn who Carly Simon meant when she sung “You’re So Vain.” It turns out it wasn’t War­ren Beatty, Mick Jag­ger, James Tay­lor, Paul Simon, Simon and Gar­funkel, Simon and Schus­ter, Sim­ple Simon or any of the other peo­ple in the enter­tain­ment world named Simon. Instead, it was record mogul David Gef­fen. I sup­pose that back in the early 1970s it would have been nearly impos­si­ble to sell a hit record titled: “You’re So Gay.”

Stick that up your Appalachian Trail

Jenny San­ford was granted a divorce from her hus­band, South Car­olina Gov. Mark San­ford, whose cheatin’ heart told on him when he lied about hik­ing on the Appalachian Trail. He instead had gone to Argentina to visit a long­time lover. The then-rising Repub­li­can star said, in first explain­ing the mis­cue, that he knew it was one of those “A” places he had planned to visit.

Swiss line up for knives in pend­ing con­flict with Libya

The Swiss Army is hand­ing out the famed Swiss Army Knives to its pop­u­lace after Libyan strong man and res­i­dent nut job Moam­mar Gad­hafi threat­ened the long-neutral Euro­pean state with a “holy war” over a 2008  arrest and brief detain­ment of Gadhafi’s son and wife. Experts have said Switzer­land should not worry about an actual war with Libya given the past out­landish actions of Ghad­hafi. How­ever, Swiss offi­cials coun­tered that no one had actu­ally believed the United King­dom and Argentina would have fought a war over the Falk­lands. Or was that Appalachia that fought the UK, asked Gov. Mark San­ford of South Carolina?

Cana­di­ans apol­o­gize for women’s hockey team cel­e­bra­tion and intend to apol­o­gize even more

The Cana­dian gov­ern­ment says it will hold a national day of apol­ogy on Sat­ur­day after some of its women’s olympic hockey team cel­e­brated with alco­holic bev­er­ages and cig­ars fol­low­ing their gold-medal win over the U.S. team. Gov­ern­ment offi­cials in Canada said that it was not suf­fi­cient in the country’s cul­ture of polite­ness to only offer a mea­ger apol­ogy by the hockey team’s gov­ern­ing body. “All Cana­di­ans should feel sin­cerely ashamed and only after a national day of remorse will it suf­fice that we show how much we wish to express our regret,” Cana­dian Prime Min­is­ter Stephen Harper said in an address to the nation, adding: “eh?”