Zen and the art of pool-cue-head maintenance


Two days ago I broke the hand mirror I use to shave the back of my head. Perhaps one who reads this does not need an explanation as to why I shave the back of my head, but suffice it to say, I do so because I shave my head completely. This I do once or maybe twice a week. Whenever it needs shaving is a good rule of thumb unlike shaving my face which just doesn’t feel comfortable for more than a day without a shave unless I am growing a beard. And, I haven’t grown a full beard in quite some time and grew a partial one, a Van Dyke I suppose one might call it, a few years back. Hair today, gone tomorrow. A little PUN-ishment for all of you who have been bad this week.

All of the above is way beyond what I intended to say about my personal hair style, or lack thereof. Nonetheless, I searched high and wide through Kroger this afternoon to find a hand mirror. One would think a hand mirror could be found at a supermarket near, say, the hair products or perhaps makeup or some such? No it couldn’t be found, at least not in my local Kroger.

A bit later I went, for the first time, to the “Dollar Or More” store which was located in what was a Dollar General (if memory serves me)and was maybe a Walgreens years before that. It’s kind of a home-grown dollar store, home-grown I suppose if home is Islamabad. Nonetheless, It had a lot of stuff, which is a good prerequisite for a dollar store. One thing this store did have was a hand mirror for $2.99. The mirror came as a set along with a large and small comb. Now I really didn’t need the comb, the large one at least. I might could use the small one on my mustache although it’s a little big to comb my ‘stache. I figured though that there was no way they’d just let me buy the mirror without also paying for the combs. In another time and place, I might have asked just to be a horse’s ass, but I just wanted to get my hand mirror and head toward vegetation.

There was only one mirror-set and it was a pinkish color, but I bought it anyhow. And why not? I know some guys will give other guys a hard time if they have something pink, it being a girly color and all. But I figure if someone was to do that to me, a 53-year-old bald man, then I reckon that guy might just be a little insecure with their gender identity. On the other hand, if a woman was to do that, I would figure it probably had something to do with their gender identity.

The bottom line is I don’t care if it’s pink, black, blue or the color of a baboon’s ass. The fact remains if I wish to continue to properly shave my own head I need some kind of hand mirror to hold up to my head in a bathroom or other larger mirror. That way I can ensure I properly shaved the back of my head and/or whether I nicked myself and need to break out the styptic pencil. Ouch.

Such is the price one must pay to make sure their head resembles a pool cue. Actually, the more I look at it now the mirror seems to be more mauve than pink. Oh well, I’ve already written what I’ve written, so take it or leave it. You’re still not getting your money back. Why? Because you didn’t pay me, jerk!

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