Author: Dick

Why is North Street blocked off by police near where I live on an otherwise quiet Wednesday afternoon? That’s what I wanted to know.

Maybe it is the fact I was once a firefighter. Maybe it is because I was a reporter. Or maybe it is just that I am a nosy sumbitch. But when I hear sirens come to a sudden stop in my neighborhood I want to find out why. It’s not like sirens aren’t a very common occurrence living only a couple of blocks from a busy hospital. But along with a couple of older ladies on the block, I stood on the street corner for a few minutes a short time ago to see why the cops and the fire department had a portion of the street blocked off. I mean, it could be a hazardous materials incident. There was a FedEx truck involved after all. Or it could be a terrorist. Or to paraphrase Shel Silverstein, it could be some nut down on the corner giving hundred-dollar bills away. But mainly we stood there because we are busy bodies. It turns out the FedEx truck clipped a power pole. So now we know.

Okay chief, remember that when Kennedy or Leahy start to ask questions you all storm in with your hoses and start spraying.

If I am going to be ill, injured, invalid or whatever other “i” word I might conjure up to explain my infirmities, I might as well be watching the Alito confirmation hearings. Something I have found useful is that, with the combination of pain pills and the hearings on C-Span, I am actually able to doze off. Slumber plus drugs plus unreality TV makes for some fascinating dialog. The problem is I can’t figure out if what I am hearing is real or if I am dreaming.

Sen. Specter: Judge Alito, do you waltz or are you more of a tango type man, you big lug?
Alito: I have never, ever, had sex with that woman.
Sen. Cornyn: What gets your whites so clean? My sheets never come out quite that white. And I’ve got many a cross to burn, er, bear.
Alito: I am Sam, Sam I am.
Sen. Hatch: Could someone please bring me my pie? Sam? Will you please bring me my pie?
Alito: Am I Sam? Sam I am?
Sen: Specter: And here comes the firemennnnn. Let’s all get wet!

And then I wake up and they’re talking about the Dred Scott decision. And you were there playing a cowardly lion and you were a winged monkey, and you were a wicked witch. Specter, Hatch and Cornyn. Oh my.

I received an e-mail from Dallas native Raine Devries asking that I pass along info from her site regarding the slaughter of horses. I don’t know much about the subject other than knowing horse meat is supposedly a big epicurean treat in Europe. And even though I am one who can feast upon all types of wild game, I do have trouble grabbing hold of thoughts on consuming the family horse. So do me a favor and read what Raine has to say.

I don’t have much to say today. I am in pain just as I have been for more than a week. The drugs work periodically. As it stands now it will be two weeks before I have an MRI to, possibly, determine what is wrong with me. Then a doctor’s appointment will come a week later in which my VA doctor will probably refer me to a neurosurgeon or orthopedic surgeon. That appointment probably won’t come for another six months. So it looks as if I have at the very least a good half-year of agony ahead. Whoo-hoo!

“Come on Sammy, sing me a little song. Camptown ladies sing this song … “
Supreme Court confirmation hearings for Judge Samuel Alito began today in the Senate. I managed to catch some of the opening statements on C-Span and just a few minutes ago heard a few of the comments from viewers upon conclusion of today’s hearings.

As for impressions of Alito, I have none. It’s out of my hands. Let’s see what happens among the wise men and women of the Senate. (Sigh!) What I do marvel at is the quality of the C-Span listener responses. I don’t care much for the fact that the network divides up the phone lines for callers among Democrats, Republicans and Independents. But the calls appear to be significantly less filtered than those you hear on the partisan radio talk shows.

Host: Hello, Quincy, Massachusetts, on the Republican line. You’re on the air.
Caller: (Sound of beer bottles and noise from a bar)Yeah, I’d jesh like to say I looove that Juggh ‘lito. Hee’sh the cat’s meow. You know I once had a cat. It got stolen. (Sniff) Oh jeez, I loooved that cat. Puddin.’ Thash her name.
Host: Next caller. Grand Forks, Nebraska, on the independent line.
Caller: Hello?
Host: Yes, go ahead.
Caller: Hello. Am I on?
Host: Yes, go ahead.
Caller: Hello. I just want to say that I think the ice forming at the outer edge of the planet Zeerbon 4 presents a significant hazard for all who defend Borgon. Gravity need not restrain the plant people because Borgon will teleport them to the fringes of the Xerolin Galaxy where they may take that short ride to Zeerbon 4. It’s all in the guide.
Host: Do you have a comment about Judge Alito?
Caller: Judge Who?

Ah, it’s live television. It’s democracy in action. It’s wacko-packed C-Span. You got to love it.