Okay, so here’s the deal. I had an idea this morning while walking. I don’t know what made me think of it. Anyway, I’ve been trying to sell a couple of items on eBay. You know, getting my feet wet (figuratively speaking). I was thinking of how I could sell an item on eBay and get a much greater return on my investment than what was expended. Then, light bulb! It came to me. eight feet deep — the CD.

I have decided to do a collection of EFD postings and throw in a few unpublished items, such as a really terrible haiku, and try to sell it (or them) on eBay. I mean, it’s not going to cost very much to produce. I might even make it multimedia with a video of my friend’s parrots Gabby and Jake. There’s nothing like exploiting animals for fun and profit! What’s the worst that can happen? No one will buy it? No, the worst that will happen is that a lot of people will want it (them, those, that, their … ) I’m going to give it a shot, but I need help. That’s where YOU the reader comes in. You didn’t really think I was going to let you off that easy did I?

Now I have a working title for the collection and a photo for the sleeve (above). That tentative title is: “What a Friend We Have in Cheeses: The most mediocre of eight feet deep.” I might have to tweak the title some. But I’m going to need some blurbs. You know, those little endorsements by people on a book cover that tells how fantastic the book that they never read is. I invite anyone out there to submit a blurb. You can use your real name if you want to, provided your name isn’t something like: S**tface Motherf***er. You must include in your blurb how you are a significant person who is endorsing this collection, such as Vernon Equinox, petty thief.

Please bear in mind that blurbs must be somewhat positive. For instance:

“When I first read eight feet deep I would vomit. Now I don’t vomit so much when I read it.”

Or …

“This is a blog that appears to have been written by a lobotomized baboon. And I mean that in a good way.”

Send your entries with “Blurb” in the subject line (why I don’t know) to I really need your help. I know some people who are real authors of books whom I could ask for blurbs. But I would like to try to spare those people of what would surely be the absolute rock bottom of their careers as writers. So bring them on!

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