Loud commercials may not cease anytime soon but at least I know I am not going crazy

It was sometime last year that I discovered television commercials at a volume level higher than the program preceding it bothered, as it does me, many Americans. That was about the time that a legislative measure sought a CALM solution to the problem.

Learning that thousands of other people are likewise hacked off about the same irritant as one’s own can be an epiphany of sorts. I figured that since enough people were also upset over the elevated commercial volumes that legislation to tackle the problem was required meant I wasn’t just some crank who gets upset over seemingly nothing. That legislation, called the Commercial Advertisement Mitigation Act (CALM,) was signed into law last December by President Obama.

It has taken a year but the law has finally been implemented. Unfortunately, it doesn’t sound like the Federal Communications Commission is likely to swoop down very soon and nab those SOBs breaking the law. Penalties for violations have yet to be determined and it is up to viewers to report those scofflaws.

Compliance may prove difficult for cable providers. But where I live — with Time-Warner having a virtual lock on cable service — it shouldn’t be all that difficult since Time-Warner’s own commercials often seem to be among the suddenly loudest.

Broadcasters have previously operated under the standard that the volume for TV ads should be no louder during commercials than the peak volume within the show being broadcast. But these ads are often placed next to very quiet moments during the show. One can imagine that, between the geological time under which the government operates and the complexities of broadcast engineering, we might just have to go right along for some time having to put up with these irritatingly loud commercials.

Nevertheless, when I rat out my local TV station or cable operator to the FCC, I will at least know I have the law on my side and that I am not the only one out there who is pissed off.

Cannons to the left of me, cannons to the right … of my minivan

A story on CNN caught my attention this morning as I brushed my teeth. I started to laugh in between molars and a few rugged bicuspids until I caught myself as the short news brief was read.

It seems an errant cannonball fired during the filming of a Discovery Channel’s “Mythbusters” episode went on a wild ride through a San Francisco Bay Area neighborhood. The show was taping at the Alameda County Sheriff’s Department bomb disposal range, where 50 previous episodes were previously filmed, when the 6-inch projectile went “zing” off a hillside and then went “zang” through two stories of a suburban home before blasting through the windows of Toyota Sienna minivan parked in a driveway. Remarkably, no one was hurt which is even more remarkable since the shell flew through a neighborhood where children were coming home from school, and through an upstairs bedroom where a man, woman and child slept through it all before hitting the minivan in which a man and his 13-year-old son sat.

“Mythbusters” is a show in which the hosts use weird scientific experiments to debunk myths, often at the expense of some automobiles and crash-test dummies including one named “Buster.” Of course, in this case it was at the expense of a house and someone’s minivan. It can be a pretty funny show sometimes. But I couldn’t help but think, looking into the mirror with my bed-creased face, that this must have scared the crap out of folks especially once the adrenalin was no longer there to smooth the edges. I’m talking the almost victims’ edges, not my bed face.

I once did a story about some artillery shells raining down in the back yard of some folks who lived in the tiny community of King, Texas. Those 155mm projectiles had flown some seven or eight miles from Fort Hood, where they had been fired from a M-109A6 Paladin self-propelled howitzer engaged in training by an artillery battalion of the Army’s 1st Cavalry Division. Army officials said after the incident that an improper compass reading was fed into the big gun’s computer, causing the cannon shells to fly off course. The guns were firing 180 degrees off target.

“Uh, sorry Sarge, wrong way.”

Some pretty large holes were made in the ground near a couple of houses and the foundation of at least one home cracked as wells as glass from windows and a chandelier was shattered.  A lady who lived in a house near where one of the shells landed told me she was in the bathtub when the shells started coming down. Imagine that, sitting and enjoying a nice bath when artillery rounds started falling in your yard. Luckily, no people, pets or livestock — this was a ranching area — were hurt.

It was incredibly lucky for those folks who took the errant rounds both in Texas and California. It is the type of happening one might hope they can laugh about someday. Some might be even laughing all the way to the bank!

Sam Brownback, gubernatorial tattle-tale, still sucks

Emma Sullivan does not have to write Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback an apology for her Twitter comment, as she likely would not have done anyway.

The 18-year-old Shawnee Mission East High School senior was making a joke when she tweeted to a friend that after a school-sponsored visit to the Kansas statehouse: “Just made mean comments at gov brownback and told him he sucked, in person #heblowsalot.” Little did Sullivan know that all Hell would break loose. Her inside joke was discovered by the watchful eyes of staffers of the former U.S. Senator and House member — who once considered a run for the GOP presidential race — and she was ratted out to her principal. The staff apparently scans social media daily to see if anyone needs to be hunted down and water-boarded for making rude comments about Gov. Brownback.

Now no school administrator likes waves being made whether it be the size of a tsunami or a fart in the bathtub. One can only imagine the Shawnee Mission East heads of state scrambling for their figurative lifeboats after the Guv’s office called about one of their students.

Sullivan said she was summoned to the office by her principal and told that major damage control was needed. She was ordered to write a letter of apology by today. Sullivan didn’t do it.

Brownback, not calling Sullivan by name, himself apologized for what he termed an overreaction by his staff. I bet the staff was thrilled at getting thrown under the bus for keeping out such watchful eyes. The school district likewise issued a statement to the media, saying Sullivan would not be required to write an apology nor would she be censored. The statement also said the episode resulted in many “teachable moments” with respect to the use of social media. Hey, I once saw Barack Obama from more than 300 yards away. Barack Obama regularly “e-mails me.” And you, the Shawnee Mission School District officials, are no Barack Obama.

That such foolish and anti-democratic actions are generated from Brownback and his camp is not at all surprising. Brownback was linked to the controversial “C Street House,” a well-connected conservative religious ‘frat house,’ in Washington when he was a member of Congress. Other reports have characterized the Kansas Republican as envisioning a “fascist theocracy” in the nation.

Luckily things worked out for Sullivan and she wasn’t subjected to something really stupid like suspension or being prevented from graduation. That would have really been sad but not unpredictable when you have thin-skinned and paranoid pols, as well as school administrators who believe that learning CYA is more important than the ABCs.

 

 

Stupid political tricks

Here are just a few of the supremely stupid ideas coming from the mouths of mostly Republican politicians but I will include some Democrats just to be “fair and balanced” like that stupid cable network.

Get to work you little heathens!

Newt. We must call him Newt. Like Cher. Like Madonna. Like Attila. Newt the pot of greed calling the kettle black says we should slack off on our “truly stupid” child labor laws. Yes, why don’t we go back to the good ol’ days, say, 1810, when about 2 million children were working anywhere from 50-to-70 hours per week? There weren’t many if any sanitation laws back then so kids would work in dirty, damp, infested factories. Whether one thinks an increased longevity of life is a good thing, it can only be imagined that the kids who did live to grow up into adults would not have significant lifespans. Some factories even put up wire fences to keep kids from escaping.

Newt thinks “union” janitors should be fired from schools and local children should be hired to clean the schools. Why not just make ’em work for punishment? Why not legalize indentured servitude of little kids? Hey, they spend too much time playing computer games and figuring out ways to massacre their classmates and teachers anyway.

Newt. He truly wastes the earth’s oxygen.

Like this is going to happen

Pat Caddell and Douglas E. Schoen must either be shills for the GOP or they have been huffing glue. The pair of pollsters wrote in a Wall Street Journal op-ed Sunday that President Obama should step aside and let Hillary Clinton run for president. I am not familiar with Schoen although I know Caddell, a former political operative for Jimmy Carter, is one of the token Democrats Faux News runs out to enhance their false claim of being fair and balanced.

These two are wasting trees and bandwidth. How many ways can I say stupid? Estúpido. Stupide. Dumm. ηλίθιος. 愚か. тупоумно. (Ed. note: Translations are from Yahoo Babel Fish. I am not responsible for their accuracy. This is just an example that many ways exist to proclaim stupidity and no matter how it is spelled, written or pronounced, it flourishes as ever in American politics nowadays.)

When comedy isn’t comedy

My final stupid political trick pick is funny man, the Godfather of Pizza himself, Herman Cain. No, it wasn’t his brain breakdown in front of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel editorial board when questioned on Libya. Instead, it was Cain being undone with his own cleverness in a late night interview with David Letterman.

Dave is one of the craftiest, and can be one of the most dangerous, television interviewers in the business. While Letterman brought a little comedy to the surface, he also sliced and diced Cain about some of the GOP candidate’s most recent blunders. For instance, Letterman got laughs with his comment that “I’m not stranger to sexual scandal,” referring to his own past sexual dalliances with staffers. But other stupid remarks from Cain’s recent past brought on the side of Letterman that makes the comic as good or probably better than most of today’s TV pundits. This was evident with a near-sneering Dave who half-asked and was half-accusatory with Cain’s claim that he was “just kidding” about his “electric fence” comment. Cain claimed he would have a border fence installed, if elected president, which would be electrified and kill people. He later called the comment a joke.

The appearance on David Letterman’s show is just one more example of Herman Cain and his incredible lack of judgment in talking seriously when the pizza man should just hit the rubber chicken circuit and give up politics.

Stupid is as stupid does. Those are words for Herman Cain to live by.

 

Searching the rails for some meaning

A sad, yet thought-provoking incident took place in our area of Southeast Texas over the weekend.

An 18-year-old, Matthew Thomas, was killed Sunday morning after being hit by a train. Thomas, who plays defensive end on the Vidor High School Pirates football team, had been lying on the railroad track for a reason that has yet to be known.

Much local attention has been paid to the story by area media, which is in my humble opinion as a journalist by trade, is as it should be. I don’t praise our local daily newspaper much these days but I feel the Beaumont Enterprise has done a pretty good job covering the story. This includes the paper bringing up the fact that Thomas is an African-American in a school where blacks make up only around 1 percent of enrollment. It is important to note that because of Vidor’s past as a Ku Klux Klan haven and where racial strife had seem to play a large part in the community for a number of years. Many in the community have also made great efforts to fight the town’s racist past and, understandably, cringe every time some kind of incident happens involving blacks and whites.

No one is saying that Thomas died because he is a black in Vidor. I hope that it is discovered by authorities that Matthew didn’t die because of his race. This is especially in light of how his teammates, friends and the community responded to his death, with shock and sorrow. Thomas appeared, from news reports at least, to be a very well-liked kid and football player even though he only lived in Vidor for a few years.

The manner in which Thomas died is unfortunately not all that rare. I can think of four or five such incidences in communities in which I have lived. I also wrote about two of those deaths in separate communities. In one of those occasions I had a small involvement.

One night I heard a call on my newspaper’s scanner at home that a man had hit by a train not far from where I lived. This was in the small town where I held my first job in journalism, as editor of a small weekly. Such emergency scenes in small towns like that one are fortunately not as restrictive for journalists as in larger cities, so I went straight to where EMTs were preparing to take the guy who was hit by a train to the hospital. The train had run over the top of the man’s head.

The tracks were down an embankment where the railroad crossed a creek. So I carefully made my wade through the brush and trees to where everything was happening. And because there weren’t enough people there, I actually helped carry the victim on a backboard up the hill to the ambulance. That was some 20 years ago and before my upper and lower spine had revolted against me.

I know there are journalists out there who never worked at a small weekly — having to report, write, layout and paste up the newspaper and write the headlines, handle complaints, sweep the floor, clean the toilet and that was when I had a secretary — who would be appalled at my getting involved in the story. But that’s life in the small city.

Eventually, I found out that the victim, who died during the 20-mile ride to the hospital, had been camping out on a railroad trestle with his friend. I learned somewhat later that the two men were crackheads and may have pulled a bunch of armed robberies between Dallas and East Texas. They were being modern-day, crackhead hobos, I guess. The victim had lain his head against the track to go to sleep. You can make your own comment there.

In another story I wrote about a man in Central Texas being hit after lying on a track. I can’t remember all the circumstances. Someone I interviewed, perhaps he was a railroad PR flak or a cop, said sometimes people have been known to lay with their heads against the rails because they figured the vibration would wake them up. Most of the cases involved alcohol or drugs. I’m not saying that is the case with Thomas because no reason has been announced, at least.

Someone committing suicide by such means is possible, I suppose, but Jeez.

I hope some reason for the death of Thomas is eventually discovered. I have mentioned I hope it isn’t foul play involving racial issues or foul play in general. But an answer, no matter the cause, might help bring a little meaning to a community who seemed fond of the young man who died.

Sometimes it is hard to make sense of the world no matter how many times one has seen or experienced something or known of such an incident. That is kind of a basic reason for news gathering and reporting.