My shrimp tacos soothe the burning feets

Oh my feet, or, feets. I always thought feet should be called feets. It’s kind of like deer.

“I saw a herd of deer. One deer paused to look at another deer. A third deer looked back at me, but not before looking at one or more of the deer in the herd.”

Great awful antlers! Writing that sentence tuckered me out almost as much as thinking it up totally exhausted me. Tuckered exhaust. Exhausted tucker. Forrest Tucker exhausted himself when he saw a deer running from a deer herd. Then he died. Forrest Tucker, (1919-1986) that is. The old dude who played Sgt. Morgan Sylvester O’Rourke in the late 1960s Western sitcom “F Troop,” Tucker also starred in the 50’s hit “Auntie Mame” and was a stage star playing Professor Harold Hill in “The Music Man.” Trouble with a capital T that rhymes with P and that stands for pool.

But I digress.

As I have mentioned here before, I have some kind of feet problem. Certainly not little feet, or “Little Feat,” like one of my favorite bands of the same name. But rather it is burning feet or burning, aching, partially numb, tender-to-the-touch feet (or feets, or feats).

The feet malady has prevented me from what is likely my favorite hobby and exercise all rolled in one. That would be walking and hiking. That is, it prevents me from walking for any decent length of time. Also, it doesn’t take standing for very long on my feet before my feet become extremely uncomfortable and causes quite a lot of pain and numbness in my feet.

My doctors have not yet figured out what is the origin of my feets (sorry, I like to say feets and if I get a little joy saying feets rather than feet when it’s my feet giving me a great deal of hell, well, then … ) problem.

Perhaps the doctors have figured out what is not the etiology of my feet malady. A big one, diabetes, has perhaps been ruled out. I had some recent blood work that show I am at the cusp of diabetes, or as I think sounds more quaint, the “cusp ‘o diabetes.” Manly yes, but I don’t like it too. I weigh now more than I have ever weighed and need to lose it. Perhaps an end is at sight for this post.

I also had, or rather my doctor, or rather my doctor who skipped out on me, had my feets X-rayed. Doctors, especially VA doctors, sometimes work in mysterious ways. What they found in my “pictures?” Hammertoes. MC Hammertoes don’t hurt me! A one-time fractured right, fifth toe. Yes, I remember the hell out of that! Lacy-Lakeview, Texas. 2004-ish. Damn that thing hurt.

But the X-ray showed not what is wrong with my feets today. And my feet, both feet, hurt much worse than my broken pinkie toe did. It drives me up the wall. It gets in the way of my working, living, walking, enjoying life.

If you just get things done until you stop, however, you get things done. Then you can sit down, relax and let your feet really hurt like a a sonofabitch. But while I was getting things done, I made shrimp tacos. They were really quick, really good and really shrimp tacos. I had a side of white hominy. Only a half-can. Try to cut back on the carbs.

What kind of taco sauce or powder did I use? Huh? What you talkin’ ’bout Willis?

Okay. Don’t hate me because I don’t have fresh shrimp. If you do, go f**k yourself. Big freezen (yes I spelled it that way on porpoise) shrimp. Fire up the grill. Unfreezen der shrimpen vit der vater un der sinken. Swish. Swish. Colander if you got ’em. Put the shrimp into an appropriate container, not a container ship unless you have a lot of shrimp and a lot of marinade. In an appropriate amount sprinkle, add, dump:

cilantro, cayenne, black pepper, salt or substitute, lemon juice, olive oil, red wine vinegar, sweet basil, garlic powder, comino, paprika

Whithk. Kind of like “whisk” only with a “thithk.” Dump the shrimp. Put a lid on it. Agitate. That is, agitate the container but don’t get agitated. Once fully agitated, make yourself a cold, adult beverage. Oh, and put the shrimp in the fridge and wait for the coals to coalesce.

Have some chopped up tomatoes, shredded lettuce, some salsa, canned chopped chili peppers, tortillas, cheese if you want but I’m trying to stay away from the C-word.

Cook the shrimp, tail down, for about 7-8 minutes. Remove from the grill. Quickly grill a couple of tortillas. Grab the tortillas with your bare hands and burn the crap out of them so you will forget about your burning feet. Put the shrimp and all the other stuff you want to put on them on them, meaning the tortillas. Eat. Drink. Be merry. Put up your feets. Enjoy. I certainly did.