Sometimes I think it pays not to listen very closely to the lyrics of certain songs. Take Thin Lizzy’s “Jailbreak” for instance. The song has a very infectious beat. I heard it today while sitting at a traffic light and almost drummed my fingers through the steering wheel. But get a load of this:
“Hiding low looking right to left
If you see us coming I think it’s best
To move away do you hear what I say
From under my breath”
They’ve got me all the way to “what I say.” But then, unfortunately, the “From under my breath” comes along and I want to scream and say: “What in the hell do you mean, ‘do you hear what I say/From under my breath?'” I would find it very unlikely that anyone would hear anything from under someone’s breath other than, providing that person is alive, breathing. So it’s a rhetorical question, huh? Not a good one at that.
These are cool lines:
“I can hear the hound dogs on my trail
All hell breaks loose, alarm and sirens wail”
These are not:
“Like the game if you lose
Go to jail”
This is about as clear as a milkshake. What game is he talking about? Monopoly? You don’t go to jail if you lose. If you lose you’re out of the game. You go to jail when you get the “Go to Jail” card. Sheesh!
Finally, we reach critical mass with these lines:
“Searchlight on my trail
Tonight’s the night all systems fail
Hey you good lookin’ female
Come here!”
The song just goes all to hell after those first two lines. “Hey you good lookin’ female!” “You go female.” “I am female hear me roar.” It’s pretty freaking awkward if you ask me. And “Come here!” I bet those lines are just teeming with success in picking up women.
On the other hand, I am not collecting a single cent in royalty money for criticizing these puzzling and often painful lyrics. And I also still like the song. I guess that makes me a moron, huh? You need not hit the “Comment” button on that one.