What were you thinking?

Wow! Still no word about Vivi the missing whippet show dog. Maybe her, its, escape at JFK Airport a couple of weeks ago is just an extended vacation for the show dog. I’m sure a show dog needs rest. See something different. Maybe it changed identities with some mutt and now is hanging somewhere in Jersey.

Psychics that have been called in and/or have volunteered to locate Vivi may have their strong feelings. But they’ve not yet produced anything. Maybe Miss Cleo can help. For a price. Don’t you think she would help? In a fake Jamaican accent. For a price?

I have no reason to disbelieve psychics. I’ve never been involved in any way with a psychic so I can’t say whether their psychic powers are real or are bulls**tsky. But I hear all of these psychics coming on these big cases — cases where people are missing or are presumed dead. I hear of them on high-profile cases like Jon Benet Ramsey or the recent missing Vivi, a case we’re all concerned about of course.

Just think about this a second. If psychics are really all they’re cracked up to be, then why don’t they help the regular person, the everyday schmuck? Why don’t they intervene when we’re going to have some a**hole on the freeway mess up our day? Why don’t they show up before we go to work and tell us to take the day off because otherwise our boss is going to ruin our day? Why don’t they tell us when we’re about to say something stupid to one of our friends that causes a dustup and causes a round of hurt feelings?

If their psychic powers are so great, then why don’t they put those powers to use with things that matter in everyday life. For you see, there is a lot better chance we’ll f**k up some way or have a day that is f**ked up than we’ll end up being kidnapped or even that we’ll be a show dog missing in New York City. I’d be happy to know what happened to the $5 bill I lost somewhere last summer. Miss Cleo, what’d I do with that five-spot? Huh? I’d buy you a … well, there isn’t much I could buy you with $5. Forget about it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *