Who was that man? I'd like to break his hand.

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“I don’t know officer. It was all a blur to me.”

Sometimes I have a quest for the unknown. Maybe it borders a little on the obsessive. On second thought, it is obsessive. But sometimes you just have to know something. It’s like, you can’t let it go until you know it. You feel like your life is incomplete to not know it. You are only half an intellectual being until you know it. Starving children in Africa can’t eat until you know it. Brangelina can’t do … whatever the hell it is that they do … until you know it. So, I guess you maybe get the picture that I have got to know it. Yes, I’ve got to find out … today’s burning question:

Who put the bomp
In the bomp bah bomp bah bomp?

I won’t rest. I wont’ eat. I won’t sleep. None of this shall I do until I determine:

Who put the ram
In the rama lama ding dong?

You might as well not count on me to do much else unless I can find:

Who put the bop
In the bop shoo bop shoo bop?

And along those same lines:

Who put the dip
In the dip da dip da dip?

Yes. I guess I’m in for a long wait until someone tells me or I discover through painstaking research just:

Who was that man?

For you see, I’d like to shake his hand. And then I would like to slap him upside the head for making an obsessive cripple out of me. Slap him up one side and down the other. Who put the bop in the bop shoo bop shoo bop? I don’t know. Not yet. But when I do find out, you’ll be the first to know.

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