Month: September 2008

One can only imagine the shock I felt earlier this afternoon when I read the headline intimating that The View’s right-wing co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck was in a snit over the political bickering amongst her fellow ABC-TV co-hosts. Who knew? I mean, her feelings are something I do not dare take for granted because I know that she at least has as much knowledge as GOP veep candidate Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin.

Unfortunately for me, once I began reading about this latest celebrity row and what it means to the security of our country … (huh?) … I quickly became confused.

What is so confusing is Elisabeth’s name. No, not that she spells her name “Elisabeth” with an “s.” Elisabeth, or rather, Elizabeth is a very important name to me as my mom was named Elizabeth. I know at least one person who spells her name “Elisabeth.” That is even though her name is Lucy. No, just kidding. But I do have a very good, long-time friend, yes even though she is a Republican, who is named Elizabeth but whose rap sheet lists her as “Suzie.” Only joking about the rap sheet, sweetie. I had another friend named Elizabeth who went by “Liza,” as in Minelli. And on and on it goes. No it’s the “Hasselbeck” which creates the confusion.

I watch pro football on and off. Some years yea, some years nay. Recently, I saw a game with the Seattle Seahawks in which Matt Hasselbeck was quarterbeck, er, quarterback.

Now Matt Hasselbeck has been around for eons. He’s 33 years old, which is ancient in NFL years. Plus, I am sure I heard the name when his dad, Don Hasselbeck, played pro football.

But after looking up Elisabeth and Matt and Don and all the Hasselbecks in the world, I came to discover Elisabeth is married to former pro football player Tim Hasselbeck. So I have to ask, who the heck is he? That is, other than Elisabeth’s hubby?

And then there is one more kink. Wasn’t that guy in Knight Rider and Baywatch named Hasselbeck? Oh, I see. It’s Hasselhoff. My bad. Well, I’m certainly glad we got this all figured out. I just hope Elisabeth doesn’t go off to Fox News. She would be so out of place there since they don’t have many blonde right wing personalities or talking heads.

Oh and PS for the 6000th time: I often have to edit this and edit this and edit this some more once it is published so there may be times one reads this and says: “What the … ?” Oh, “times” is an exaggeration I am sure. Don’t worry about it. I don’t.

John McCain went on the CBS News with Katie Couric this evening to ensure the nation got it that the media was picking on his running mate. Good for you John! God forbid anything happens to you if you are elected president and some world leader or even worse, some world media members decide to pick on “President Palin” then we know your spirit will there to keep those media meanies aways.

I wrote something just a few minutes ago but then I zapped it. It just didn’t read like I thought it should. So should I feel bad about it? No and here is why.

I am not on deadline. I am not getting paid for writing what I am going to write or have written just now and most of all, I am hungry.

Thus, I intend to walk outside, light up the grill and put on some ribs. What happens out of that will depend upon my skill, the cut of meat, the marinade, whatever it is I decide to serve on the side and karma. When I say karma, I don’t mean a pig’s karma or someone else’s karma that might have become a pig (luckily, I didn’t see any lipstick on the pig). I mean karma in general.

But I don’t intend to let karma to starve me out, so I best get my arse out and light up the grill. Sorry I couldn’t be more profound. However, a man needs to eat.

“I guess you’re wondering why I’ve asked you all here today … “

Sources have told EFD that Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has devised a very clever strategy to outfox Democratic U.S. Sen. Joe Biden of Delaware in the vice presidential debate on Thursday. Palin, who as governor serves as commander-in-chief of the Alaska National Guard, ordered her troops to active duty with a deployment on tap to St. Louis, the site of the debate. Palin’s plan calls for the National Guard members to either call out answers to assist her during the debate or otherwise shout: “OoohRahhh!” Palin spokespersons said she acknowledged that such use of the military force might lighten the state’s defense against neighboring Russia. However, Palin said in a press release that the Air National Guard has been left behind and will be on hand to shoot down Russian leader Vladimir Putin should he fly into Alaskan airspace.

Last night’s presidential debate was sort of torturous to watch. Neither John McCain nor Barack Obama particularly inspire me, personally, with confidence. But in all seriousness, it wasn’t a bad match as the actual art of debating goes.

John McCain showed what I believe to be great skill once both he and Obama struggled through the first questions regarding the economic crisis. I suppose what makes his performance even more impressive was that he probably spent more time than his opponent involved in his ploy of “suspending” the campaign and going to Washington for some face time in Congress on the fiscal meltdown. Thus, he must have had somewhat less opportunity for practice. Even though I must say, McCain strikes me as a person who thinks practice is for lightweights.

As for his negatives, McCain pulls off being a smart ass well. Perhaps it is a natural gift or something he honed as a fighter jock. However, he comes off annoying when doing condescending. And he didn’t do himself any favors telling Obama that the Dem nominee was just some little kid who should not be seen and not heard.

Obama did really well, once again, past the economic crisis part. Both men acted as if the subject was a toxic gas. The Illinois senator showed a more than ample grasp of the foreign policy issues and he stood his ground against McCain’s pedantic snipes.

Unlike many of the pundits (and I am not really a pundit) who, afterwards, examined the debate ad nauseum I think it would be charitable to call the outcome a tie. And I have to say that although a president doesn’t have to be likable to appear presidential, McCain’s attitude was clearly unattractive.

I can’t wait for the Thursday debate between veep candidates Biden and Palin although I will approach it with trepidation. Like someone I heard on TV say last night, I don’t really like watching humiliation and unless someone programs Miss Alaska correctly she is liable to start spewing smoke and flames like some overwrought robot.