Category: Orphans

 
Army photo by Sgt. Christopher T. Sneed.

For those who are protesting taxes and government spending today here is a little reminder of what your tax dollars buy, courtesy of Combat Outpost Narizah, Afghanistan.

Several conservative groups are trying to pretend that tomorrow’s so-called “Tea Parties” to protest government spending is some big earth-shattering movement. But don’t be surprised if the only ones who see it that way after it is all said and done is Fox News.

Once the cameras go away and the politicians leave after their little speeches it would not be surprising to see that the tea parties had zero effect on government, our way of life or anything else of substance.

As many of you realize, the pitiful right-wingers are at their nitwit’s end. They can’t do anything to get a break. Even when they jump up and down and get all “24”ish and say the military is too slow to shoot the pirates who were holding the kidnapped American merchant captain, along comes SEAL snipers and simultaneously take out three pirates while safely rescuing the captain. Thus, the military and, subsequently President Obama, steals the right’s thunder (once again).

The right has long led the nation’s silliness factor when it comes to politics or anything else practically. (Remember “Freedom Fries?”) The tea party is just more of the same old same old coming from the silly wing of the Republican Party.

It amazes me how people in business get away with outright rudeness these days. Here is a forinstance (yes I am aware how I spelled “forinstance” — I’m not in business here, I can afford to be rude). As part of my job I called a business today which does tax returns to get some information. Now I realize this is the busiest time of the year for such businesses. But the fact is, I get this same information from the business every couple of months, plus my deadline for passing along this information is Thursday and the information I seek — when I ask the person I normally deal with — takes only five seconds to confirm.

But the person I normally deal with couldn’t talk until next week, or so said the receptionist. She finally put me on the phone with her boss who barely heard three words out of my mouth before slamming the phone down on me.

I realize these people are busy, but I am not calling for frivolous reasons plus I do so every two months and not to mention the fact these people have agreed to provide us with the specific information we are looking for.

I put such experiences in the context of the work I used to do as a newspaper reporter. It was similar in ways to the part-time work I do now in that it can be telephone-intensive. Also, regardless of one’s schedule sometimes, the caller’s deadline is not going to go away nor can it wait.

Personally, I didn’t like getting calls when I was on deadline either. And especially was that the case with some of the callers I got such as those who had long-winded stories about how some government officials and a secret cabal of multimillionaire merchants were conspiring against them. But sometimes I just had to sit there and take it and slap myself silly to keep me from shouting obscenities at the person on the other end of the line. Why would I do that? Well, it’s called business. It’s called human decency.

There really isn’t a lot of sense in being rude no matter how much you want to be. It might make you feel better temporarily, but in the end what does it really accomplish? You pig-headed, pea-brained hyena.

Tomorrow is my annual family reunion. Since it is being held at my brother’s place in Brenham, Texas, (Yes home of Blue Bell ice cream), I decided to skip getting up ultra early for a three-hour drive and stay in a motel about halfway, alongside I-45 in Conroe, just 40 miles or so north of Houston.

I’m staying at a Motel 6 and I’m not ashamed to say it. I am not ashamed to say I only payed $38 for a simple, clean room. But my stay has started on a rocky start. I was in the vending room about 30 minutes ago and slipped on a slick spot. I managed to stay upright but could feel a sharp pain shoot through my left hamstring. Now my hammie and left butt cheek just kind of hurts, as does my back and foot and probably as time goes on, my whole body. That wasn’t what I needed. I hope things will be better in the morning. Sometimes they are.

Happy Easter from Butt-Busting, Texas.

If you happen to be a believer in evolution then you might understand how certain human body structures got the short end of the stick as life made its way up the evolutionary chain. Backs and feet immediately come to mind.

It isn’t hard to imagine how weight could be better distributed by walking on all fours. That is not to say I intend to start doing it. I would last probably three seconds before plunking on the floor. If I were successful at doing it I’m sure there would probably be some long ago city ordinance prohibiting the act which was never repealed and thus the boys and gals in blue would come get me.

So we walk on all twos, if that’s the hand we are dealt.

Walking upright certainly complicates matters such as stress and strain on the spinal column. The spinal column is pretty doggone important to the body machine. So if there is a problem with steering then we can have other problems, say with locomotion (the reference being “moving,” not the song written by Carole King and Gerry Goffin which was first recorded by Little Eva and later Grand Funk Railroad), or even with breathing.

Then, there is the feet. Ach ja. Die Füße. You have these two relatively minor platforms on which sits a big ol’ tub o’ lard, or even a Twiggy. I do not know the ratio of pounds per square inch of pressure exerted on the feet. I would perhaps look knowledgeable if I were to look that up and report it here. But one can only do so much with two feet. Also, wouldn’t you think a blog named “eight feet deep” would discuss feet more often than it does? Think about it and write down your answers. But please don’t give them to me.

There is, or was, a point to be made here. It has to do with my feet. Something is wrong with my feet, other than the way the look and the fact that they are just under one foot in length. Yes I have almost foot-long feet. Someone asks my what’s under my shoe, I tell them a foot or almost a foot.

Recently I did something twice that I had never done before. That was to take back two pairs of shoes, first for exchange and secondly for a refund.

I decided it was time for a pair of new hiking shoes. So I bought a pair after trying them on, making sure they fit well and taking the obligatory walk around the shoe section. Upon returning home and taking a walk, my feet felt like they were hit with John Henry’s hammer. My left big toenail is still purple. I thought, this isn’t right. So I return the shoes and exchange them for another pair. I wore them twice and although they still weren’t as painful, they were still relatively Cruel Shoes. I finally returned them and got my money back, deciding to buy a pair elsewhere.

The pair I now have felt as though I was walking on air when I tried them on at the store. That is how a pair of great shoes is supposed to feel. But even as I continue to walk while wearing them, I still have foot pain and today even had some numbness.

I told my doctor about the ordeal last week. I have been buying shoes on my own for more than 35 years and so I know when they fit and when they don’t fit. Or so I thought. But these shoes fit. And they are a nice moderately-priced pair of Timberland hiking shoes, not something I bought at the dollar store. So I figure I have some kind of foot problem. Now I have to wonder, what is the problem?

Well, perhaps the doctor or a podiatrist will have to figure that out. The Web site ePodiatry lists almost 50 different foot problems one might have. It is mystery, I tell you. But we will get to the bottom of this, feet first, or this blog isn’t eight feet deep. And if it’s not, then what am I doing here?