Eight Feet Deep

The Baltimore Sun Web hed says it all.

I don’t particularly want John McCain to be president. In fact, I don’t want him to be president. But I think the latest smear campaign against him last week in South Carolina — he was smeared when running against Bush in 2000 in South Carolina — is despicable. The person who says McCain sold out his former prisoners of war when he was held by the North Vietnamese says for years he couldn’t get anyone to listen to him. But methinks the timing is a bit suspect.

Bush: “Why the economy is so bad, I might have send the vice president out to shoot us some birds to eat.”

Well, it’s official. Prez Gee Dubya has finally admitted that the nation’s economy has “areas of real concern.” I’m glad we cleared that up.

The Dubya Man is putting forth a $145 billion package to stimulate the economy. The plan calls for massive tax cuts for the wealthiest one-third plus “a few bucks for the rest of the folks if we have it left over.” I’m only kidding. But the first thing you hear the Republicans in office say when there is any mention of economic woes is “tax cut.” Just as the first words you hear GOP elected officials say when the economy is robust are “tax cut.”

I love my Republican friends and have long agreed to disagree with them. But the Republican party has something bordering on an obsession with cutting taxes. It makes me wonder if there were no taxes, would the Republicans pass bills creating taxes just so they could cut them?

One thing is for certain. The amount of bucks I am hearing taxpayers may receive in rebates from the government will not be nearly enough for me to help stimulate the economy. I will use my rebate to pay my back taxes. Then if I have any money left I might eat out somewhere. If they want us to stimulate the economy, they need to throw some big bucks our way. Send me a million dollars. By golly, I can guarantee I will spend money like a crazy person.

I’ll be looking for my check, although I will not be holding my breath.

In 10 days I have to go to Washington, D.C., for another week of training for my part-time job with Uncle Sugar. Actually, I will arrive that Sunday afternoon and return to Texas Friday night. Since I’ve already tentatively scheduled separate dinner dates with one and possibly two friends, that will not leave me a whole lot of time to do much. Nonetheless, I have wanted to check out the Newseum — the interactive museum of news. I figured it would be open by now, but I just called and was told it won’t open until April. Oh well, maybe next time.

I did spend a little time surfing the Newseum Web site. I used to look quite often at their “Today’s Front Pages” feature which displays as it says the day’s front pages of newspapers from around the world. I don’t get a chance to see it much these days. It is interesting to compare newspapers in this country with those of foreign nations. Countries of South America, for instance, have some particularly interesting front pages. One might find a beauty on the front page of a Brazilian paper who, while not being exactly “N.N. ” (Nearly Naked) is somewhat “N.F.F.F.F.,” or (Not Far From Fabric Free.) Such as shown in the Amazônia Hoje of Belém, Brazil.

The bizarre and even shocking can be found in other places such as on this front page of La Chiva published in Medellin, Columbia. Warning: Contains Graphic Images. I don’t speak Portuguese but the best I can figure, the cow on this front page is responsible for the death of motorcyclists, two of whom are pictured as well.

There are some pretty interesting pages from throughout the world so if you have the time give the Newseum site a scan — then give yourself a merit badge for cultural diversity.

Our economy was last seen traveling in a clockwise direction.

The Federal Reserve’s so-called “Beige Book” released today told us what we already knew albeit in a more subdued way than I like to describe it.

“Reports from the twelve Federal Reserve Districts suggest that economic activity increased modestly during the survey period of mid-November through December, but at a slower pace compared with the previous survey period.”

Thus proving that even good is bad and evil is evil. The Fed cited the slow holiday sales and “weaknesses” in auto sales among the economic woes throughout most of the country. But the spending on tourism was positive, said Fed. This led the board’s chairman Ben “Let’s Cut ‘er a Point or Two” Bernanke to suggest the nation go to Disney World.

“Hey, whatever works,” said Fed.

Reports from most of the Fed’s districts indicated that certain “nonfinancial service industries including health care, hospitality, legal, and insurance” had seen a “robust” demand. All of which is very encouraging news to people who get sick, need a hotel room or are getting sued.

The Fed went on to say that businesses faced increasing prices for food, petrochemicals, transportation costs, Downy Fabric Softener, booze, cheap floozies, and opium. The report released by the Federal Reserve Board of Governors is called The Beige Book because its real name, Summary of Commentary on Current Economic Conditions, takes way too much effort to say. It is released eight times a year provided the person who types up the report isn’t on vacation at Disney World.

Buried in the lede. Dead in the saddle. Asleep at the Wheel. Lions. Tigers. Bears. Cuban spies. Oh my.

Only 16 miles down the road from where I live is an American penal colony of proportions which may be unmatched these days, at least in the U.S. The “federal prison complex” on the swampy marshes bordering on what we call “Mid-County” — literally middle Jefferson County, Texas, between Beaumont and Port Arthur — itself has three separate facilities. This includes the maximum security U.S. Penitentiary as well as low and medium security “correctional facilities.” The state of Texas also has a major share of property down there in the marshes: the Gist State Jail Unit, the LeBlanc Unit, and the Stiles Unit. The controversial Texas Youth Commission also operates a facility in that area along with the Jefferson County jail and the county juvie lock-up. Did I leave anyone out? If so, forgive me.

That is truly, a s**t-load of cons.

What I find intriguing is how many stories that lie behind those walls, even though many of which are undoubtedly bulls**t spewed by inmates who proclaim themselves forever innocent of any crimes. The self-proclaimed “innocent inmate” who found God and now walks the straight and narrow is to be expected. I did not, however, expect to find a small Communist nation doing the hero-worship thing with one of the inmates in the prisons on the swamp.

Despite my conservative friends’ opinions, I am not a regular reader of the official state paper of Cuba known as “Granma.” I guess granpa must be hanging out with Elian. Sorry. If you must know about Granma, click here. Grandma, or grandmother in espanol, is “abeula” which you would know if you ever watched a Whataburger commercial. On Granma Internacional’s Ingles Web site is an exhortation for all good party boys and girls to write to the “Miami Five.”

The Miami Five is known in the U.S. as the “Cuban Five.” To the Communist Cubans they are heroes. To the U.S. government they are what one would call Cuban spies and even murderers. And one of the Miami/Cuban Five (formerly the Jackson Five after Tito and Michael left, no, stop, please!) — Ramon Labaniño — happens to be staying 16 miles down the road from me in the U.S. Penitentiary Beaumont.

The U.S. government convicted Labaniño, a.k.a. Luis Medina, and another of the five of conspiracy to commit espionage against the U.S. Labaniño did not deny working for Cuba’s Directorate of Intelligence but his defense was that they were in this country to fight terrorists who threatened their country. One of our local incarcerated spy’s cohorts was also convicted of “conspiracy to commit first-degree murder based on his role concerning the February 24, 1996, shoot-down of two unarmed civilian aircraft in international airspace by Cuban Air Force jet fighters, which resulted in the deaths of four people, three of them U.S. citizens.” Sounds like a solid bunch o’ “heroes” to me.

Normally, I feel rather sad to find prisons being an economic base or cottage industry as it has become in my area. I don’t have anything against those who work in those prisons. I have friends and relatives who either have or are still working for various prisons. I have the utmost respect for those who keep such thugs as Labaniño, a.k.a. Luis Medina, behind bars. I just think the fact that prisons have become a growth industry for my region and state and even nation, doesn’t speak well for our society.

But in the case of those who spy against our country and set up people to be murdered by a foreign government, I am afraid they don’t get off easy with me. If there are any of the hundreds of prisoners living in that mosquito-infested marsh a mere 16 miles away whom I am glad to see behind bars it is this so-called Cuban “hero.” I hope he enjoys the sweltering summers here. Oh, and I am afraid I won’t be writing you anytime soon, Luis, or whatever you are calling yourself these days.